Sou Hiyori was a mysterious person. He was a man who seemed to excel in every field, who knew and was loved by everyone, and yet nonetheless one who no one truly knew anything about. They knew of his talents, his personality, the kindness he would show them and all the things that he had done for them and those around them, but nothing more. He was a person who shaped the world around him everywhere that he went. But of all of that, and for all the rumors and claims of his prestige, any time he was questioned, he only laughed that gentle laugh of his, and dismissed himself as a person of no real consequence. If he had any talent, then it should only be his duty to share it with the world.
Thus, the only thing that anyone could say for sure was that Hiyori was a once-in-a-generation genius who had determined to use his intellect and skills to advance the medical field and provide care for others, and that he worked for a prestigious company. Everything else was merely their own experiences and thoughts on him recorded for others. Their interpretations were what shaped him, and it was those people he touched that created the identity for "Sou Hiyori."
Perhaps it was because of his area of expertise that he was able to maintain such an air of patience with Komaeda. He had worked with adults and children alike to help solve their issues, after all. Hiyori approached him with the same countenance that he did everyone else - warm, kind, and undeniably genuine. He wasn't one to offer much in the way of rebuttals, finding that trying to force a person to change through aggression was rarely effective, but instead met him where he was in each conversation.
He loves Komaeda's views. He loves how broken this child is. He loves every inch of his broken, near-death body. He loves every disorder, every mental health problem, every disparaging remark. He loves how self-destructive Komaeda is, and there's a bubblign warmth when he thinks of how he'll one day lead himself to ruin without ever experiencing true happiness. A wonderful, cute, lovely person, far too perfect to exist. Ahhh... How delightfully lucky Hiyori had been to meet him.
That's why the smile that he looks over Komaeda's latest injury is warm and genuine, though his eyes wrinkle with concern. He shakes his head with a little sigh and a soft laugh. He really was prone to injuries. He insists on taking care of him now, just as he always had and always would (because what doctor wouldn't?) ]
Ah, Komaeda-kun... What am I going to do with you? You keep undoing all of my hard work... Why, if I didn't know any better, I'd say you were doing it on purpose!
[ Hiyori keeps his tone gentle and light, though there's an undertone of worry to it. It's the tone of a concerned parent picking their child up out of the mud. He doesn't hang on that point, though - he doubts it would be effective on a person who values their own life so little. So, he opts to instead tease him a little more, ]
Hm... You do know you don't need an excuse to come see me, right? Though I'm flattered that you enjoy my company so much.
(deleted comment)
don't worry it can only get more evil and ill from here
[ Hiyori only smiles as he works, as patient as he ever was. Komaeda was a difficult patient to work with. He's set up an IV with his patient's good arm by now, finding that it would be a problem if he bled out before he could be fixed when his being conscious was already a small miracle. He wonders if it wouldn't be worthwhile to recommend him as a case study. He was so fortunate, so durable, despite the myriad of afflictions. He would either die for hope as he so wanted, used for experimental treatments for his conditions, or he would endure living a much longer life should they so succeed. Hiyori is certain that either outcome would be befitting of such an unfortunate child.
There's a shadow of disappointment as Komaeda reaches a conclusion, and he supposes that the child must be having a bad day. But he covers it up quickly with a sheepish laugh and nods in agreement. It wasn't true at all, but with dementia patients, it was useless to argue with them. Instead, one had to redirect them. So, he tries to meet him where he is. ]
Yes, I suppose you're right. I came here to see Komaeda-kun, who is always on the side of hope. Won't you talk with me for a little while?
[ That expression on Komaeda's face is pure bliss. How happy he cold be, if only not for the stopper he put in his own path. How different he could be, if only somebody had love him. He reaches out to take that injured arm and to start cleaning the wound. He shouldn't encourage this behavior, but he suspects that any direct efforts to deter him from it will be more encouraging than encouragement itself might be.
So, he goes on as he has before. This conversation is familiar to him by now. He's watching carefully, though, for any signs that he might take that as an invitation to do any further harm. That would be unfortunate, but perhaps this conversation would be enough to distract him. He was so passionate about these things. ]
I want to know how Komaeda-kun manages to inspire such hope in others. Won't you tell me?
[ Ah, so he had remembered. Hiyori gives that sheepish smile again, shoulders lifting slightly. It's the look of a child who had been caught sticking their hand in the cookie jar, but there's something else to the way that he tilts his head and looks at him - could Komaeda truly blame him for wanting to hear such inspiring words over and over again? It's like a favorite story. Komaeda's favorite story is hope, and so so that becomes Hiyori's favorite story each and every time that they speak. ]
Ahaha, please do forgive me, but I learn something new from you each time.
[ That much, at least, isn't a lie, and he's grateful to be forgiven so easily. He continues his work. Hiyori takes care not to not do more harm than needed. He nods when appropriate as Komaeda tells the story, glancing up with a disapproving frown at the mention of Hinata and shaking his head with an irritated click of the tongue and a murmured "unbelievable," when asked the initial question. He litters in these little signs to show that he's listening and invested even as he switches to applying a salve - a development made possible by his offers, which would expedite the healing process.
But compared to Hiyori and those he worked with, even the talented he spoke of were nothing more than stepping stones. Those at the school he admired were too dense to even recognize the climate that they fostered. They birthed situations like this. That was fine, though; Hiyori neither aligns with hope nor despair, but whichever suits him at any given time. He's nearly finished when his hand is taken, and he raises his eyes. His gaze is warm and affectionate, admiring and just a little bit envious.
Perhaps he should kill those people who keep making Komaeda hurt himself so. Perhaps he should kill every single one of them, who are too cowardly to take their own lives, so that his patient no longer has anything to inspire. ]
... Yes. I've never seen such an admirable, pure love for anyone.
[ He pauses for a moment, seeming to consider something carefully, and then: ]
Can I tell you a secret, Komaeda-kun? You have to promise not to tell anyone, though.
Edited 2021-11-12 21:42 (UTC)
(deleted comment)
they can do that once they're done inflicting misery it's fine
[ His voice is gentle, but the smile drops for the first time in the conversation. He lets out a little sigh, and and there's another moment of deliberation. It takes a little too long, and he can feel the resolve in that injury. Hiyori briefly considers pulling his hand away to start working on the stitches, but this delicate work was better when the patient was cooperative. He supposes Komaeda will repeat it if he remembers.
Will he, or won't he? It should lead to entertaining results either way. ]
You see, I attended the same school as you do now when I was younger... Ah, you won't believe me, and perhaps they have scrubbed the records, but I still have the proof of my days spent there.
[ It's not a lie, and there's nothing in his gaze or voice that suggest it to be so. But then, what about him did? He was barely older than Komaeda. Hiyori was a man who couldn't have been older than his mid 20s, but already had more skill and success than most in his field would in a lifetime. It was in the way that Hiyori carried himself, in the way that the world bent to him, though
There's a soft laugh. Hiyori doesn't doubt that he'll provoke a reaction with such a statement. He hadn't mentioned it since those days. It was only his company that still knew of him as the byproduct off that toothless, cowardly, blind school. His talents had only been so wasted there. He doesn't offer that as an explanation for his disassociation, though, instead simply offering: ]
Ah, but please don't tell anyone. You see, they no longer want me using their name.
[ There's a gentle chuckle, and there's a glimmer in his eyes. Whatever had happened, he certainly seems to have no regrets about it. Why would he, though, when he'd surpassed what they had offered him? Why would he, when he had such a cute patient before him? ]
We had a small disagreement, you see.
(deleted comment)
he'll visit it daily but only after he's dragged out his life as long as possible
[ It's no lie. Sou Hiyori had been among the most talented of all of them. That was why such a paltry place could never satisfy him. Yet, it had brought him two of his most treasured companions. They had become a part of a system that would change the world.
But he had no hope, and he had no despair. Sometimes Hiyori existed to guide the world, sometimes he existed to destroy it, and sometimes he would simply watch as it spun. Sometimes he would throw a wrench into the system's cogs and watched to see what would happen. That was who he was, and for that alone Hiyori makes no apologies. But he remembers those days fondly, and he remembers the bloody end that acted as a period even moreso.
Why, who knows what would have happened if his current employer wasn't so sharp, or if that school wasn't such a cesspit? ]
You shouldn't, Komaeda-kun. I was a poor fit for that school, you understand, though they accepted me readily. I'm sure they've corrected that mistake by now.
[ He does pull back now, allowing Komaeda to have his arm back, the smile a permanent fixture on his face. He had been talented for his talent. He had been scouted for the fact that compared to all others, his parents were among the most terrifying, with connections to every singular group. He was scouted because above all else, he should have had one of the greatest talents to offer the world.
Yes, he remembers that fondly. Hiyori thinks they haven't changed at all. ]
I was merely there to break their complacency. It's important to make a small mistake every once in awhile. You need a shock to the system every once in awhile to ensure that you stay vigilant.
[ Hiyori lets out a small sigh, shaking his head with a sheepish smile that says that he expects no understanding. ]
Ah, but I've been so blessed as to be able to support two of my former classmates here. I believe you'll know their names - Harai Emiri and Namida Michiru. They shine brilliantly now.
[ He shrugs now. His tone is level, but it's a switch from his normal soft-spoken and patient demeanor - he's firm on this, unwavering. ]
Well... You may judge me if you wish. But promise me that you won't grow complacent, Komaeda-kun?
[ If he does, somebody worse than Hiyori will slip in the cracks. That's why Hiyori's willing to share this little secret. ]
Edited 2021-11-12 23:50 (UTC)
(deleted comment)
it's fine they probably have a cure for that hoarded somewhere, he'll pull it out just for him
[ Hiyori instinctively steps forward to intervene, but stops as he looks to the chair placed in front of him. But he frowns, the worry and just the faintest hint of hurt written on his face. He was such an emotional child, but that was to be expected. He'd lived a troubled life, and he had a disease that inflicted brain damage on him. The damage would only worsen with time, and his behavior would only become more erratic. Hiyori follows his faze, shifting slightly, but he doesn't move yet.
It's like dealing with a frightened cat. If one tried to approach them, they would hiss and claw on their way to escape. He holds steady instead, biting his lip. ]
Ah, could it be that I've made you hate me after all, Komaeda-kun? [ He glances down, then back up. ] I suppose don't blame you...
[ That's not it. This was a child who couldn't see his own value to others. He was a person who craved attention more than any other, but it was difficult to accept him when it was freely given. For a person like that, sentiments such as you're not a bother meant nothing at all. They would twist it around in their head, warp it into pity and a consequence of their own failures for forcing anyone to care for them.
He starts there, letting his hand start to lift before he forces it down, instead wringing his hands in front of him to keep him busy. A small gesture that shows his concern without threatening to become anything much. He keeps his eyes on him, though. The boy wouldn't be able to move very quickly in that state, and Hiyori was faster than a normal person might be. ]
... You've misunderstood me, though. Of all my patients, you're is the one that I care for the most, Komaeda-kun. I'm quite particular about who I take, but I wouldn't think of entrusting your care to anyone else.
[ Hiyori doubts those words will do anything but inflame things further, but he plants them there regardless. There's someone who cares for him, there's someone who's afraid of being rejected by him. If he could hang onto that, then it might be useful going forward. But that, too, is honest - he has no need to take any patient, and he only did so when it so suited him. It was easy to do, given his skill level, as he always had a more pressing matter and a more pressing patient that demanded his attention. ]
(deleted comment)
even better, he'll finally do some good for the world
[ His voice tints with guilt, but the way he glances away makes it clear that it's not his inability to love his patients equally that's weighing on him. That much wasn't possible. If their patient feels this way, if they were taking such extreme measures, then it meant that they had already failed to live up to their duty. But he's glad that it seems to have a better effect than expected. It seems to have at least stopped
But he considers the words for a moment, turning them over in his head slowly. Komaeda could have been so much more, and Midori does feel genuine regret for that. He could have excelled. He might have been able to get help for his disorders sooner. But the talented wer eloved, and the miserable masses were forgotten, and in the end none of it had ever proven Hiyori wrong for his choices and values. ]
Komaeda-kun... [ He keeps his voice soft as he brings his gaze back, eyes fixing on the blood dripping onto the chair for a little too long before he brings them back up to Komaeda's face. ] You and I both know that's not how love works.
[ He could no more choose to care about this person than Komaeda could choose not to care about those talented people who he chased after and admired so.
He decides to push a little further, to try and frame it in words that this patient might understand. ]
If you snuffed out someone's light, don't you think that would just mean that it wasn't strong enough? ... No, I would say that my life would be far dimmer if you were to leave it now.
[ Hiyori would overcome it, of course. That was what it meant to have talent. But there would be no point to it. It would be a pointless heartbreak for the sake of leaving someone lonely. He places a hand on his chest, fingers curling, head inclining as he seems to consider what he's saying here. ]
... But, it's up to you, Komaeda-kun. I don't want you to suffer for my selfishness.
[ There's a kind of quiet resignation to those words. Hiyori won't allow Komaeda to die in front of him any more than he would any other patient here, but he won't force him to stay either. ]
(deleted comment)
he might need an antiacid ever though, i'm pretty sure trash will give you indigestion
You should be more respectful of people's feelings, Komaeda-kun. I believe I know myself well enough. Of course I care about you.
[ His voice remains firm, but not unkind, not all that different than a parent scolding their child for being insensitive. Hiyori folds his arms, staring for several seconds before he slumps all at once. It comes as no surprise, but he doesn't push the matter any further than that. This was a person who played the role of a person who was happy to be alone and to die alone to compensate for his loneliness. It wasn't much different than the role Hiyori played of a kind, loving doctor who had merely gotten too attached to a patient.
It would be dangerous to push it any more than that, and so Hiyori scales it back. ]
You look like you're getting ready to audition for a horror movie. You won't be getting much of anywhere like that. Won't you at least let me finish caring for you? You can get your stitches, you can get cleaned up, and then be on your way.
[ He lets out another sigh, training his face into the neutral and clinical expression of a doctor dealing with a patient who no longer wished to see him. That, too, was part of his job. ]
... Does that seem fair? You must trust me that much, right?
[ His looks on patiently, waiting to see if this compromise will be acceptable. ]
Edited 2021-11-13 03:28 (UTC)
(deleted comment)
just a little blood for the greater good, just make sure you remove all the slime before serving
[ Hiyori offers no complaint as Komaeda bloodies his clothes, red botches staining the white lab jacket and pressed white shirt beneath it. Rather, he wraps his arms around Komaeda to pull him closer, one moving around his back while the other comes up to the back of his head. He reaches up a little more and strokes his hair with a strange mix of worry and relief. He shushes him quietly, grateful that he was at least able to get that through to him. The people with thinking solely of their own lack of value was that they sometimes did so at the expense of others. ]
There, there... You don't need to apologize, and I won't forget what you've done for everyone. I promise... So listen to me for a minute, okay?
[ It's not a lie. He thinks again that this would be a good candidate for their trials. They had shown promise. It might extend his life a little, or it might kill him immediately. He supposes if he could convince Komaeda, it might be worth it. Would the other even see the value in that, though? He was so insistent on dying for a lack of anything to keep him tethered to life. So though he'd like to guide him back down, he doesn't immediately. Hiyori instead keeps him still, strokes his hair, heart beating quick in his chest.
For a person like this, there was no better cure than to have someone meet them where they were. There was no better cure than giving them what they craved most of all - all of those things that they'd convinced themselves that they don't need. ]
They say that one man's trash is another man's treasure, don't they? I think the same applies to people. I don't think you're trash, Komaeda-kun, but even if you were...
[ His actions are completely inappropriate for a doctor, but they've already crossed that line. However Komaeda would think of him now, the barrier between doctor and patient had broken down. That, too, was something that Hiyori had always been quite comfortable with. It was how he preferred to work.
So leans forward now to kiss the top of Komaeda's head. ]
... Would it really be so bad to let yourself be treasured by somebody?
(deleted comment)
they both are and it is and oh my god zooms to get rename token
[ It feels routine at this point. Their meetings are a fun little act that they put on, but only Hiyori is able to remember them later. He changes the details a little each time, hoping that some of his love will stick, but in the end it never seems to. This is the first time he's told this particular secret, though, and he hopes that at least this will stick. He hopes his name will be spoken in those halls once more, though he suspects even this greatest show of affection will be lost to disease.
But it's routine, and so he's learned not to keep writing utensils on his person. It did make things quite difficult, but this patient was too high risk to even keep a pen or a pencil around. He wonders if they were to do this a hundred times, if his love might finally stick. What a pair they were, with Komaeda's unrequited love for so-called Ultimates, and Hiyori's love for this boy who no one could possibly find love for.
Hiyori lets him dig, he lets him cover his mouth, and he lets that go on until he believes it might be enough. Then he reaches up to take that hand with his own, gingerly removing it from his face. ]
You're right. I should do more to try and understand your feelings.
[ He kisses the inside of that cold, frail wrist all the sam ]
There now... I promised I would discharge you once we were done though, didn't I? Once you've composed yourself a little, we can finish up.
[ Hm... Though, if he leaves it there, he might run into objections. Komaeda wasn't the type who cared about himself, but he did others, and so... He slowly lowers Komaeda's hand before releasing it to let that arm, too, now snake around his frail body. ]
Can you endure it a little while longer, Komaeda-kun? For my sake?
(deleted comment)
FRIENDSHIP WITH KILLED ENDED, SLIME IS MY FRIEND NOW
[ It was part of what made Komaeda such a difficult patient. He was erratic and violent, and even Hiyori's aides were remiss to deal with him. That was fine to the doctor, who would only smile and apologize to those who were inconvenienced by it. He was seen as a saint for his excessive patience in these cases, his unshakable emotional resolve which never seemed to wear down despite the constant heartache and threats and occasional injuries. Even those injuries, though, were of little consequence when he was in the process of exchanging so much of his human body.
But he doesn't particularly enjoy being stabbed, and he doesn't particularly enjoy unruly incidents, and so it is that he gives a grateful, relieved smile when Komaeda acquiesces. This was why the others failed to handle him, both the talentless majority and the talented alike. But Hiyori is different, and he brushes Komaeda's hair out of his face with a nod. ]
Of course. I don't mind. They no longer wish to associate themselves with, but my time there was meaningful.
[ It's not a lie, because it had taught him about their world. Hiyori bares no grudge, because such a place wasn't worth wasting his feelings on. He squeezes Komaeda gently before pulling away slightly, keeping one arm around him for support and letting the other take his hand once more as he tries to guide him back to the exam table. ]
In those days, I was known as the Ultimate Surgeon. That's a frightening title, don't you think? I would have preferred something more charming like "doctor" or "healer" to being known for being adept with a knife.
[ He offers a small laugh. But he always had a unique talent for using such tools - a dexterous hand that could perfectly utilize knives and scissors and other things as well. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
no subject
let me know if you need any edits
Sou Hiyori was a mysterious person. He was a man who seemed to excel in every field, who knew and was loved by everyone, and yet nonetheless one who no one truly knew anything about. They knew of his talents, his personality, the kindness he would show them and all the things that he had done for them and those around them, but nothing more. He was a person who shaped the world around him everywhere that he went. But of all of that, and for all the rumors and claims of his prestige, any time he was questioned, he only laughed that gentle laugh of his, and dismissed himself as a person of no real consequence. If he had any talent, then it should only be his duty to share it with the world.
Thus, the only thing that anyone could say for sure was that Hiyori was a once-in-a-generation genius who had determined to use his intellect and skills to advance the medical field and provide care for others, and that he worked for a prestigious company. Everything else was merely their own experiences and thoughts on him recorded for others. Their interpretations were what shaped him, and it was those people he touched that created the identity for "Sou Hiyori."
Perhaps it was because of his area of expertise that he was able to maintain such an air of patience with Komaeda. He had worked with adults and children alike to help solve their issues, after all. Hiyori approached him with the same countenance that he did everyone else - warm, kind, and undeniably genuine. He wasn't one to offer much in the way of rebuttals, finding that trying to force a person to change through aggression was rarely effective, but instead met him where he was in each conversation.
He loves Komaeda's views. He loves how broken this child is. He loves every inch of his broken, near-death body. He loves every disorder, every mental health problem, every disparaging remark. He loves how self-destructive Komaeda is, and there's a bubblign warmth when he thinks of how he'll one day lead himself to ruin without ever experiencing true happiness. A wonderful, cute, lovely person, far too perfect to exist. Ahhh... How delightfully lucky Hiyori had been to meet him.
That's why the smile that he looks over Komaeda's latest injury is warm and genuine, though his eyes wrinkle with concern. He shakes his head with a little sigh and a soft laugh. He really was prone to injuries. He insists on taking care of him now, just as he always had and always would (because what doctor wouldn't?) ]
Ah, Komaeda-kun... What am I going to do with you? You keep undoing all of my hard work... Why, if I didn't know any better, I'd say you were doing it on purpose!
[ Hiyori keeps his tone gentle and light, though there's an undertone of worry to it. It's the tone of a concerned parent picking their child up out of the mud. He doesn't hang on that point, though - he doubts it would be effective on a person who values their own life so little. So, he opts to instead tease him a little more, ]
Hm... You do know you don't need an excuse to come see me, right? Though I'm flattered that you enjoy my company so much.
don't worry it can only get more evil and ill from here
There's a shadow of disappointment as Komaeda reaches a conclusion, and he supposes that the child must be having a bad day. But he covers it up quickly with a sheepish laugh and nods in agreement. It wasn't true at all, but with dementia patients, it was useless to argue with them. Instead, one had to redirect them. So, he tries to meet him where he is. ]
Yes, I suppose you're right. I came here to see Komaeda-kun, who is always on the side of hope. Won't you talk with me for a little while?
[ That expression on Komaeda's face is pure bliss. How happy he cold be, if only not for the stopper he put in his own path. How different he could be, if only somebody had love him. He reaches out to take that injured arm and to start cleaning the wound. He shouldn't encourage this behavior, but he suspects that any direct efforts to deter him from it will be more encouraging than encouragement itself might be.
So, he goes on as he has before. This conversation is familiar to him by now. He's watching carefully, though, for any signs that he might take that as an invitation to do any further harm. That would be unfortunate, but perhaps this conversation would be enough to distract him. He was so passionate about these things. ]
I want to know how Komaeda-kun manages to inspire such hope in others. Won't you tell me?
you asked for this js
Ahaha, please do forgive me, but I learn something new from you each time.
[ That much, at least, isn't a lie, and he's grateful to be forgiven so easily. He continues his work. Hiyori takes care not to not do more harm than needed. He nods when appropriate as Komaeda tells the story, glancing up with a disapproving frown at the mention of Hinata and shaking his head with an irritated click of the tongue and a murmured "unbelievable," when asked the initial question. He litters in these little signs to show that he's listening and invested even as he switches to applying a salve - a development made possible by his offers, which would expedite the healing process.
But compared to Hiyori and those he worked with, even the talented he spoke of were nothing more than stepping stones. Those at the school he admired were too dense to even recognize the climate that they fostered. They birthed situations like this. That was fine, though; Hiyori neither aligns with hope nor despair, but whichever suits him at any given time. He's nearly finished when his hand is taken, and he raises his eyes. His gaze is warm and affectionate, admiring and just a little bit envious.
Perhaps he should kill those people who keep making Komaeda hurt himself so. Perhaps he should kill every single one of them, who are too cowardly to take their own lives, so that his patient no longer has anything to inspire. ]
... Yes. I've never seen such an admirable, pure love for anyone.
[ He pauses for a moment, seeming to consider something carefully, and then: ]
Can I tell you a secret, Komaeda-kun? You have to promise not to tell anyone, though.
they can do that once they're done inflicting misery it's fine
[ His voice is gentle, but the smile drops for the first time in the conversation. He lets out a little sigh, and and there's another moment of deliberation. It takes a little too long, and he can feel the resolve in that injury. Hiyori briefly considers pulling his hand away to start working on the stitches, but this delicate work was better when the patient was cooperative. He supposes Komaeda will repeat it if he remembers.
Will he, or won't he? It should lead to entertaining results either way. ]
You see, I attended the same school as you do now when I was younger... Ah, you won't believe me, and perhaps they have scrubbed the records, but I still have the proof of my days spent there.
[ It's not a lie, and there's nothing in his gaze or voice that suggest it to be so. But then, what about him did? He was barely older than Komaeda. Hiyori was a man who couldn't have been older than his mid 20s, but already had more skill and success than most in his field would in a lifetime. It was in the way that Hiyori carried himself, in the way that the world bent to him, though
There's a soft laugh. Hiyori doesn't doubt that he'll provoke a reaction with such a statement. He hadn't mentioned it since those days. It was only his company that still knew of him as the byproduct off that toothless, cowardly, blind school. His talents had only been so wasted there. He doesn't offer that as an explanation for his disassociation, though, instead simply offering: ]
Ah, but please don't tell anyone. You see, they no longer want me using their name.
[ There's a gentle chuckle, and there's a glimmer in his eyes. Whatever had happened, he certainly seems to have no regrets about it. Why would he, though, when he'd surpassed what they had offered him? Why would he, when he had such a cute patient before him? ]
We had a small disagreement, you see.
he'll visit it daily but only after he's dragged out his life as long as possible
But he had no hope, and he had no despair. Sometimes Hiyori existed to guide the world, sometimes he existed to destroy it, and sometimes he would simply watch as it spun. Sometimes he would throw a wrench into the system's cogs and watched to see what would happen. That was who he was, and for that alone Hiyori makes no apologies. But he remembers those days fondly, and he remembers the bloody end that acted as a period even moreso.
Why, who knows what would have happened if his current employer wasn't so sharp, or if that school wasn't such a cesspit? ]
You shouldn't, Komaeda-kun. I was a poor fit for that school, you understand, though they accepted me readily. I'm sure they've corrected that mistake by now.
[ He does pull back now, allowing Komaeda to have his arm back, the smile a permanent fixture on his face. He had been talented for his talent. He had been scouted for the fact that compared to all others, his parents were among the most terrifying, with connections to every singular group. He was scouted because above all else, he should have had one of the greatest talents to offer the world.
Yes, he remembers that fondly. Hiyori thinks they haven't changed at all. ]
I was merely there to break their complacency. It's important to make a small mistake every once in awhile. You need a shock to the system every once in awhile to ensure that you stay vigilant.
[ Hiyori lets out a small sigh, shaking his head with a sheepish smile that says that he expects no understanding. ]
Ah, but I've been so blessed as to be able to support two of my former classmates here. I believe you'll know their names - Harai Emiri and Namida Michiru. They shine brilliantly now.
[ He shrugs now. His tone is level, but it's a switch from his normal soft-spoken and patient demeanor - he's firm on this, unwavering. ]
Well... You may judge me if you wish. But promise me that you won't grow complacent, Komaeda-kun?
[ If he does, somebody worse than Hiyori will slip in the cracks. That's why Hiyori's willing to share this little secret. ]
it's fine they probably have a cure for that hoarded somewhere, he'll pull it out just for him
It's like dealing with a frightened cat. If one tried to approach them, they would hiss and claw on their way to escape. He holds steady instead, biting his lip. ]
Ah, could it be that I've made you hate me after all, Komaeda-kun? [ He glances down, then back up. ] I suppose don't blame you...
[ That's not it. This was a child who couldn't see his own value to others. He was a person who craved attention more than any other, but it was difficult to accept him when it was freely given. For a person like that, sentiments such as you're not a bother meant nothing at all. They would twist it around in their head, warp it into pity and a consequence of their own failures for forcing anyone to care for them.
He starts there, letting his hand start to lift before he forces it down, instead wringing his hands in front of him to keep him busy. A small gesture that shows his concern without threatening to become anything much. He keeps his eyes on him, though. The boy wouldn't be able to move very quickly in that state, and Hiyori was faster than a normal person might be. ]
... You've misunderstood me, though. Of all my patients, you're is the one that I care for the most, Komaeda-kun. I'm quite particular about who I take, but I wouldn't think of entrusting your care to anyone else.
[ Hiyori doubts those words will do anything but inflame things further, but he plants them there regardless. There's someone who cares for him, there's someone who's afraid of being rejected by him. If he could hang onto that, then it might be useful going forward. But that, too, is honest - he has no need to take any patient, and he only did so when it so suited him. It was easy to do, given his skill level, as he always had a more pressing matter and a more pressing patient that demanded his attention. ]
even better, he'll finally do some good for the world
[ His voice tints with guilt, but the way he glances away makes it clear that it's not his inability to love his patients equally that's weighing on him. That much wasn't possible. If their patient feels this way, if they were taking such extreme measures, then it meant that they had already failed to live up to their duty. But he's glad that it seems to have a better effect than expected. It seems to have at least stopped
But he considers the words for a moment, turning them over in his head slowly. Komaeda could have been so much more, and Midori does feel genuine regret for that. He could have excelled. He might have been able to get help for his disorders sooner. But the talented wer eloved, and the miserable masses were forgotten, and in the end none of it had ever proven Hiyori wrong for his choices and values. ]
Komaeda-kun... [ He keeps his voice soft as he brings his gaze back, eyes fixing on the blood dripping onto the chair for a little too long before he brings them back up to Komaeda's face. ] You and I both know that's not how love works.
[ He could no more choose to care about this person than Komaeda could choose not to care about those talented people who he chased after and admired so.
He decides to push a little further, to try and frame it in words that this patient might understand. ]
If you snuffed out someone's light, don't you think that would just mean that it wasn't strong enough? ... No, I would say that my life would be far dimmer if you were to leave it now.
[ Hiyori would overcome it, of course. That was what it meant to have talent. But there would be no point to it. It would be a pointless heartbreak for the sake of leaving someone lonely. He places a hand on his chest, fingers curling, head inclining as he seems to consider what he's saying here. ]
... But, it's up to you, Komaeda-kun. I don't want you to suffer for my selfishness.
[ There's a kind of quiet resignation to those words. Hiyori won't allow Komaeda to die in front of him any more than he would any other patient here, but he won't force him to stay either. ]
he might need an antiacid ever though, i'm pretty sure trash will give you indigestion
[ His voice remains firm, but not unkind, not all that different than a parent scolding their child for being insensitive. Hiyori folds his arms, staring for several seconds before he slumps all at once. It comes as no surprise, but he doesn't push the matter any further than that. This was a person who played the role of a person who was happy to be alone and to die alone to compensate for his loneliness. It wasn't much different than the role Hiyori played of a kind, loving doctor who had merely gotten too attached to a patient.
It would be dangerous to push it any more than that, and so Hiyori scales it back. ]
You look like you're getting ready to audition for a horror movie. You won't be getting much of anywhere like that. Won't you at least let me finish caring for you? You can get your stitches, you can get cleaned up, and then be on your way.
[ He lets out another sigh, training his face into the neutral and clinical expression of a doctor dealing with a patient who no longer wished to see him. That, too, was part of his job. ]
... Does that seem fair? You must trust me that much, right?
[ His looks on patiently, waiting to see if this compromise will be acceptable. ]
just a little blood for the greater good, just make sure you remove all the slime before serving
There, there... You don't need to apologize, and I won't forget what you've done for everyone. I promise... So listen to me for a minute, okay?
[ It's not a lie. He thinks again that this would be a good candidate for their trials. They had shown promise. It might extend his life a little, or it might kill him immediately. He supposes if he could convince Komaeda, it might be worth it. Would the other even see the value in that, though? He was so insistent on dying for a lack of anything to keep him tethered to life. So though he'd like to guide him back down, he doesn't immediately. Hiyori instead keeps him still, strokes his hair, heart beating quick in his chest.
For a person like this, there was no better cure than to have someone meet them where they were. There was no better cure than giving them what they craved most of all - all of those things that they'd convinced themselves that they don't need. ]
They say that one man's trash is another man's treasure, don't they? I think the same applies to people. I don't think you're trash, Komaeda-kun, but even if you were...
[ His actions are completely inappropriate for a doctor, but they've already crossed that line. However Komaeda would think of him now, the barrier between doctor and patient had broken down. That, too, was something that Hiyori had always been quite comfortable with. It was how he preferred to work.
So leans forward now to kiss the top of Komaeda's head. ]
... Would it really be so bad to let yourself be treasured by somebody?
they both are and it is and oh my god zooms to get rename token
But it's routine, and so he's learned not to keep writing utensils on his person. It did make things quite difficult, but this patient was too high risk to even keep a pen or a pencil around. He wonders if they were to do this a hundred times, if his love might finally stick. What a pair they were, with Komaeda's unrequited love for so-called Ultimates, and Hiyori's love for this boy who no one could possibly find love for.
Hiyori lets him dig, he lets him cover his mouth, and he lets that go on until he believes it might be enough. Then he reaches up to take that hand with his own, gingerly removing it from his face. ]
You're right. I should do more to try and understand your feelings.
[ He kisses the inside of that cold, frail wrist all the sam ]
There now... I promised I would discharge you once we were done though, didn't I? Once you've composed yourself a little, we can finish up.
[ Hm... Though, if he leaves it there, he might run into objections. Komaeda wasn't the type who cared about himself, but he did others, and so... He slowly lowers Komaeda's hand before releasing it to let that arm, too, now snake around his frail body. ]
Can you endure it a little while longer, Komaeda-kun? For my sake?
FRIENDSHIP WITH KILLED ENDED, SLIME IS MY FRIEND NOW
But he doesn't particularly enjoy being stabbed, and he doesn't particularly enjoy unruly incidents, and so it is that he gives a grateful, relieved smile when Komaeda acquiesces. This was why the others failed to handle him, both the talentless majority and the talented alike. But Hiyori is different, and he brushes Komaeda's hair out of his face with a nod. ]
Of course. I don't mind. They no longer wish to associate themselves with, but my time there was meaningful.
[ It's not a lie, because it had taught him about their world. Hiyori bares no grudge, because such a place wasn't worth wasting his feelings on. He squeezes Komaeda gently before pulling away slightly, keeping one arm around him for support and letting the other take his hand once more as he tries to guide him back to the exam table. ]
In those days, I was known as the Ultimate Surgeon. That's a frightening title, don't you think? I would have preferred something more charming like "doctor" or "healer" to being known for being adept with a knife.
[ He offers a small laugh. But he always had a unique talent for using such tools - a dexterous hand that could perfectly utilize knives and scissors and other things as well. ]
SIGHS AND PULLS OUT WALLET...
I'M JUST GOING TO DIE LAUGHING TAG NOW he can be a good husband, kill him and take his money
GOOD YOU SHOULD, YOU DID THIIIIISSSSSS they really are though??? this guy's a rich asshole
LMFAOOOO he is very domestic so he'd be a good wife
he'll make his cute husband cute bento and welcome him home every day and dote endlessly
komaeda just accept his love already, every last drop of it
*yet*
damnit komaeda they're not vampires they can't just drink your blood
it's not normal but midori is a vampire so it probably would be fine to feed it to him
A DECENT HUMAN BEING FOR ONE THING
A REALLY, REALLY POWERFUL MICROSCOPE. AND EVEN THEN IT'S ACTUALLY JUST DUST ON THE SCREEN.
OH MY GOODDDD THAT'S MY NEW WAY OF EXPLAINING HIM, HE REALLY IS
he gobbles them all up like the big bad wolf
that's how he gets you, he disguises himself as a cute lil pom friend
they're both enablers, take himm home and just spritz him with water when he acts out
just let them have a cute domestic life and hopefully not torment their neighbors too much
THEY WILL BE LOUD look maybe they'll get lucky and get the neighbors that are never home
true but look like they're both rich af couldn't they just like buy out the adjacent apartments
lbr they're just two rich horny bastards
then he gets kicked outside and can't kiss him for hours bc he just ate pure sugar
not soon enough
yes so hurry up and stab him preferably in the stomach
they were just meant to be
IT'S FINE harai is going to kill him now so we don't have to worry
he did know better and has done this before....... but they still need him so maybe he live
it's fiiiiiiiiiine asunaro controls the cops too so they technically already have him
THEY JUST LITERALLY CONTROL EVERYTHING????? it's crazy idgi
SEE THIS IS WHY THEY NEVER HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT NEIGHBORS midori got connections
somebody needs to call keiji in particular. or alice. alice can kill him.
MTTD omg i'm CRYING!! poor alice, gonna crack under the pressure (jk he'd probably be happy to)
dear god he really does have junko energy doesn't he? i shudder to think of those two coordinating
dear lord now we really can't let that happen, that would be a disaster
being crushed by the weight of retail hell but i'm team househusband sorry
he's already mean and hot though????? look at him
idk he's constantly thinkin' bout killing all of komaeda's not-friends i'd say that's mean
NO SEE THIS IS GREAT then he can get new friends who don't hate him and aren't terrible
to be fair he'd at least tell him to be friends w/ ppl who don't hate him