[ Judging by the look in his eyes, Hiyori was released both too late and too early. He was, without a doubt, the Ultimate Surgeon who could handle any amount of pain. He was also Sou Hiyori, who had no desire for such humanly constructs as pain and suffering. The latter seems to have run out as he paws at Komaeda, a pathetic effort that's barely more than a clawing of the hand that had once held his phone.
What was he planning on doing if Komaeda didn't answer...? Well, isn't that obvious? Hiyori would have been shook from his slumber by a lack of oxygen, shifted his head to the side, and continued his soft snoring. As it is, whatever they had given him is strong enough that no normal person would have been left alone on it - and no doubt if they thought he'd be texting a random patient on it, Hiyori would not have been either. Yet, he looks up with his chin rested on the pillow, continuing, ]
Komaeda-kun is my wife tonight...!? Ahh, I'm so blessed... ♡
[ To his credit, this truly is the most content Komaeda might have seen him outside of the hospital - he was always a little tense, even during his most relaxed state, aware yet occasionally not aware of an upcoming threat. But now, well - it's the same as his career. None of the above seems to matter. Not his name, not his image, not his career, no his ambitions and paranoia... There truly is just Sou Hiyori, plain and simple. ]
Komaeda-kun...! Cheap takeout is fine, so just order something...
[ He holds out his hand, and it's clear that he doesn't realize quite yet that his phone has been taken. He seems to realize the same after several seconds, blinking, but undeterred. ]
Hmhmhm... I think Chinese take out is traditional... Ahh, a night with Komaeda-kun.... If you're my wife, can I call you Nagito-kun...? ♡♡♡♡♡♡
[ Perhaps it's because of his rich upbringing, but he seems a little excused at the idea. Whatever the case, he certainly seems pleased about the idea in his head. But with that said, he seems to have exhausted all of his efforts, so he's going to turn his head to the side (visibly flinching as he shifts positions despite it al) turning his face to the TV side as he waits for Komaeda to join him.
That said, he is also going to edge himself over a little and stretch out his hand to take the box. It takes a little more effort than it should, but he does manage to take it. It's his one bit of true competence for the day.
Thank God he's not going to remember any of this because no amount of hope would save him from death by embarrassment. ]
Edited (MINOR ADDITION it doesn't change anything i just forgot to note this) 2021-12-01 18:21 (UTC)
[ have you ever seen somebody wither so quickly? Probably, but it's still impressive how quickly the disappointment sets in. Komaeda is a nice name, but so is Nagito. Hiyori thinks he'd like to have that level of intimacy. He considers the little box for a moment before slowly forcing himself up and into a proper sitting position, not quite letting his back touch the back of the sofa, setting it on his lap. ]
Usually, yes... I've never been married, though... It's been hard for me to maintain a relationship for very long.
[ But not always. There were those who were older who didn't, and there were those who had their own reasons for choosing not to drop them. It's not very common in this day and age though, and he can't think of many who he's met who would fit that criteria. As for himself, Hiyori has never reached that level of closeness with another person. There was always too much of a gap, and even his long term relationships were brief. They were there and gone in the blink of an eye, just as Komaeda would be.
He doesn't mind that, though, and even if he did there's not terribly much that bothers him right now. It really is like watching a little kid as he stares down at the box, trying to decide on the exact right moment to open it. He looks up as Komaeda starts to pick up the containers. As expected, there's empty sweets containers, though to his credit it does seem as though he's made some effort to find things with actual nutrients (though perhaps somebody else had aided him with that effort.)
There's dust on the furniture, and it's just a bit more unkempt than usual - based on the miscellany, he seems to have been taking things and then forgetting about them. He had his bedroom fixed, and the rest of the house cleaned then, but it's been left as is since. There's a bottle of pills mixed in with all the other items. But Hiyori himself doesn't seem as well kept as usual either - the slightly glazed look, the way his hair is kept down and just a bit messy from being slept on, the simple sleep set... Compared to how pristine and put together he normally is, it's quite the change.
Even so, he seems calmer than normal, without the tension that constantly pulled at him. There's no checking the time every few minutes, no busily moving from one thing to the next, no crunching every second and planning out five steps ahead while perfecting matching himself to every situation.
There's just that dreamy smile as he opens the box to see the adorable gift that Komaeda had gotten him. It's the exact kind of delightful little treat that he might have picked up for himself if he saw it, though it seems a bit too personalized for that. He blinks slowly, taking it in. It's almost too pretty to eat (though he no doubt would before long anyway.) ]
[ There's a thought rattling around in the back of his head, the vague suggestion that Harai and Namida had spoken with him about a similar subject, but it's buried too deep and it's easy to set off to the side. With the platter having been removed from his hand, Hiyori is free to reach out to take a bottle of pills off the table. He shakes it, and seems satisfied to find it full. There's a soft laugh as he pops the top off of it. ]
You're right. No, no kids... My patients are enough for me.
[ It's fortunate that he doesn't have any particular desire for children, because Hiyori could in no way commit to the responsibility. ]
I wouldn't mind having a cat, though, or maybe a dog.
[ Though he wouldn't own one of those, either, due to the way that he lives his life. His job and his patients are enough. It was enough for him to continue moving up in the world, and it was enough for him to care for himself. He's happy with this way of living. He shakes out a couple of pills into his hand before replacing the cap. The pills sit in his hand, and he stares down at them blearily. When had he taken his last dose...? He struggles to remember.
He does glance up, though, the more pressing issue at hand finally catching up with him. ]
Ah, Komaeda-kun, do you need a hairband? I keep some in the bathroom, but you really don't need to trouble yourself - I just haven't been able to have anyone over...
[ He stands up, a little wobbly but away enough. He did use a cleaning service, but it might not be hard to imagine why he wouldn't be eager to let anyone in given his present condition. It might have been preferable for him to stay in the hospital for longer if he hadn't insisted that he would have another person to care for him while he was out of sorts, and that it would pose no issue; he had already given his spare apartment key to someone.
But he was losing huge chunks of time and couldn't even get it scheduled, much less coordinate with another person to have them come over. ]
[ When questioned, Hiyori seems to grow puzzled himself. It was difficult to keep track of any one thought for very long, and even moreso if he couldn't focus on any one thing. He freezes the second that Komaeda's hands touch his hips, and there's a small attempt an interjection at the start ("No long--!?") but those concerns are quickly lost as Komaeda guides him back down the sofa. There's a grimace as he against the back of the sofa, but he recovers quickly enough. ]
Ah... Alright, Komaeda-kun...
[ He really is out of it. He watches as Komaeda leaves the room. He does check the time now and, finding it to be about right, pops the pills in his mouth and takes a few sips from a half-empty glass of water to wash them down. He lets out a small sigh as he lays back down, on his side now, watching the dimmed and unchanging screen. They had instructed him to avoid moving more than necessary, and sitting up was hard (but then, so was everything.)
It shouldn't be too much trouble to find the hairbands in the bathroom. They're tucked away in a drawer under the sink, along with a couple hairbrushes and other accessories. There's a pair of containers, one with simple black bands while the other has an assortment of colors. ]
Really!? Don't worry, Komaeda-kun, it's fine! I can barely feel anything. Ah, if you want to watch something else the remote is here--... ow, ow, ow...
[ Which does appear to be true for the most part, and one can only imagine the agony he would be in right now without painkillers, but unfortunately it also allows him to do stupid things like lean forward so he's halfway on his stomach and stretching over as far as he can on the coffee table to grab the remote there. Naturally, all of the above puts strain on his back, and in the process of this he very nearly just flops forward onto the floor.
He's just going to hang out there, halfway off the couch, with one arm stretched out on the coffee table with the remote in hand and the other on the floor for a minute here until his newest wave of dizziness passes. It was probably a bad idea, but that fact doesn't quite occur to him. One can only hope that he does not remember even a single moment of his time spent in this state or the embarrassment truly will kill him.
He laughs weakly, and it comes about ten seconds later than it should. Truly, Komaeda is seeing the best of the Ultimate Surgeon today. ]
[ He's fortunate that Komaeda is here, really. The medication he's on makes it difficult for him to tell if he's sustained an injury, and even when it registers it's dull. He has a few recent bruises hidden under his clothes from that. It was a consequence of caring for himself while under the influence, and his saving grace has been how much he's slept and how little he's moved. But he's pulled up now and before he knows it he's laying in Komaeda's lap. He shifts his position a little, nuzzles his cheek against him, and places his hand on Komaeda's thigh as he settles in. He seems happy enough with his set up though.
Really... It would be nice to have a person around. Hiyori wonders why he never has now, and perhaps if he were always this mentally empty he could. For now he smiles that dreamy smile, but he truly does seem content. This is, after all, everything he'd hoped for. ]
... You're right. I'm sorry Komaeda-kun. I'm...
[ He falls silent for a moment. Even now, in a half aware state, somehow admitting to being alone feels like too much. It's too sad for anyone. He was still in contact with his parents, of course, but he hadn't told them what occurred. They were kind and loving, but busy, so busy, just like him. So that smile falters before returning as he feels fingers brushing his hair back. It's so warm, so comforting... It doesn't matter what it is, he just wants to touch this person. He just wants to feel their touch on him. ]
Well, I suppose I'm just used to caring for others! But... I just want to think about Komaeda-kun right now... Because I love you more than anyone...
[ Is this the best time to ask him a question such as that, or is it the worst? It depends on one's perspective. Hiyori blinks several times, slowly processing that. Why he's like this...? He thinks about that, but it's not until Komaeda continues on that he finally grasps it. It's hard for him to focus on the question when the feeling of soft fingers running through his hair is so distracting, the distinct feeling of his hair being tied back. His thoughts wander, and he thinks that he really should redo his guest bedroom as well. The master bedroom was done in blue, so perhaps shades of red would be good for the guest bedroom. It would add some color to his house. It had been suggested to him that he do so.
Red and blue... He closes his eyes briefly, losing track of his original thoughts as the conversation moves on. ]
Black pepper steak...? Ah, I've never tried that, but if Komaeda-kun recommends it then I will.
[ He's relatively still now, seeming to have found a comfortable position, though his head raises slightly as he yawns before settling back down, and his sluggish thoughts finally remind him to answer the original question. It's a little out of order, but perhaps it doesn't matter. He needed the extra time to properly think on it, and even now he can't quite do so. But the answer is simple and honest, and it rolls off his tongue easily, ]
I love you, Komaeda-kun.
[ The rest is more complicated. If he were in the right state, he might be able to affirm Komaeda's thought; the world was gray and dull, devoid of all color. It was boring and simple, and he his genius meant that he needed to make his own entertainment at all times. What hope was there for a person who could learn any skill, who could take anything that they desired, and who could overcome any obstacle? He had built himself up so far that everything seemed trivial. He breathes out a little sigh. ]
My talent can't be replicated... No, I have a natural talent that no one will match... Hm, I suppose you'd need to artificially replicate it, then...
[ He murmurs these incomprehensible things, which would no doubt make sense if only he had the sense of mind for them to do so. As it is, they're just the remnants of whatever he's been puzzling through. It doesn't matter, in the end, if talent is man made or artificial. But he's curious to see the effects of the latter. Would it bend, would it break, would it succeed? Would they grow as bored with the world as him? Would it an even grayer and emptier world than his own? Ahhh... There was truly no hope for those who could only watch from above...
Those thoughts come and go quickly now. His world has red and blue, which meld together to form purple. It has a botch of green hitting against black and white. A drug-induced happiness is still a form of happiness. ]
I love you, Komaeda-kun, [ He repeats, ] I'm never bored with you... Ahaha... I'm always so happy...
[ And for somebody who was so difficult to match, that was a rare treat. ]
[ There's a little objection at the claim that he hasn't eaten properly, though it is of course true enough. There were too many times when he lived off of sweets when well and his current state hasn't done him any favors. His attention shifts quickly, and he nods slowly. It was such a ridiculous idea, such a pointless endeavor, but it was one in which they'd hoped to achieve. It was the idea of an AI with a heart... No, the idea of creating a human. Not just that, the idea of using such means to preserve one's own existence.
Wouldn't that be wonderful? Wouldn't it be amazing? To create the perfect human, to become a perfect replication, to no longer have to worry about heirs and replacements and injury and death. There were other uses for such creations and technology, but those were the ones of particular interest to him. Ah, but even if one were to disregard that, the thought of what changes could be made to the human mind using technology! Erasing and adding memories as one pleased, extensive rewiring... There were no limits to what work could be done.
That, too, is why the Ultimate Surgeon's work would never be done, and this is just a brief reprieve from it. He laughs softly, and even through his mental haze Hiyori thinks just briefly that he'd like Komaeda to see how much potential humans have. ]
Mm... If it's not, we'll make it so.
[ He blinks slowly as Komaeda continues on. ]
Hm? I'm not making anything difficult.
[ He murmurs, seeming puzzled by that claim. His statement is not quite right either, he is fact making many things difficult for many people, but in this particular case Hiyori is coming up blank. Though speaking of coming up blank... He probably had an answer to that question at one point or another, but he seems to have lost it in the midst of all the subject changes and nearly breaking an arm. He will part his lips when prompted though, continuing to murmur, more to himself this time, ]
[ Hiyori wonders what Komaeda would say if he told him that his partners tended to be of the majority. The couple of times he had dated another Ultimate was in order to further his own agenda in one way or another, but her otherwise didn't concern himself with such matters. After all, if he wanted to date somebody so much like him, he would just mimic Narcissus and fall in love with his own reflection. The world was gray and dull, but every once in awhile he could find somebody who would show them a hint of color, and every once in awhile he could stain his world with a brilliant red.
Though he will admit, that beautiful scarlet that had stained his world at Hope's Peak had been the most beautiful of all.
But even so, he prefers the shades of red and blue that Komaeda brings into his life, the way that they mix into purple. ]
If it's somebody Namida chose for you, I'm sure they'll do their job well.
[ He no doubt knows it's inevitable that he would be transferred, but it still stings a little to hear. No doubt the would be one of the most skilled in the field, but nonetheless a disappointment his eeyes
Speaking of his desires and actions... He rubs his face against Komaeda's lap like the drugged up weirdo that he is. ]
Bu~ut I can still take you back, you know~ ♡
[ Actually he can't for another several weeks, but details. He seems enthusiastic enough about it. ]
[ He doesn't get the chance to point out that he likely knows the doctor he's seeing now and could likely ask for him back before he's cut off by Komaeda. Hiyori can't be upset with that, though, not when Komaeda's showing him affection like this (and more generally, really.) It's hard with his current limitations.
The question takes him a little longer to answer, as he's sluggish to process it. Work on someone else...? ]
Maybe...
[ His tone suggests that he's making an effort to politely refuse that suggestion. ]
I don't take many patients... That's why I can give them the best care possible.
[ He had more than enough money to satisfy him, and ASUNARO paid as well as his job. Hiyori only needed to take those cases that interested him enough to do so, those where his talents could be put to use, and then occasionally in the interest of doing business with a person who could make him a particularly good offer. That wasn't terribly common, though, he was no longer the Ultimate Surgeon and so there was no need for anyone to approach him.
But truthfully, the spot that Komaeda had taken was empty for some time before him. ]
[ Hiyori doesn't like unfinished business, and he doesn't like untreated patients, but he is once more unable to say so due to his own sluggish pace combined with the rapid changes in topic and circumstances. He listens patiently instead, blinking slowly. He should eat, but it doesn't seem like any particular problem if he doesn't; the painkillers suppressed his appetite, and he supposes he must still have some instant ramen bowls hidden somewhere about.
He lifts his hand off of Komaeda's thigh, groping around for Komaeda's hand so that he might place his hand over it. ]
... Mm. I'd be happy if you did, Komaeda-kun.
[ He shifts a little, trying to look up at him properly. ]
Nothing bad will happen to you as long as I'm here because you made me a god, remember...?
[ Though he's only as much of one as before - although, perhaps not quite. He had killed and controlled before, but now he had survived death as well, so perhaps it truly could be called a god. But that hardly mattered. He wouldn't let anything happen, and if it did, he would fix it. He would figure something out. ]
[ He's too fuzzy headed to find an accurate response to that claim, but Hiyori inherently understands that he has no desire to be God if warnings are all that he can offer. He had already given so many, after all.
But none of that seems to matter, no more than the movie in the background or the thought of eating, or even the oncoming storm. There's only the warm feeling of Komaeda's lap, the small smile that graces Komaeda's lips, the sight of his green eyes. Emerald green eyes, beautiful despite their emptiness. Dementia patients are like gemstones, and he wonders if Komaeda isn't more like an emerald than a diamond - a hard stone that's durability is ruined by the fractures and inclusions scattered throughout it. If only he were allowed to, Hiyori will fill in every crack and transform him into something entirely different.
If the Ultimate Surgeon were allowed to play God with him, he could be revived as a human once more. He could just be another person, loved by others. ]
That's alright... I have what you brought me! [ that's not nutritionally sound at all but details. ] Just as long as you're here, Komaeda-kun. [ He slowly moves his head back and forth, nuzzling his nose against the other's. ] It's been lonely.
[ The name Yukizome gives him a pause. He blinks slowly as Komaeda is speaking, trying to put the name to a face, and when he finally does his smile twitches a bit. Was it the same one? It wasn't such an uncommon surname that it couldn't be another, but just the possibility is enough to make him uncomfortable. Without a doubt, the name and talent matched.
He wonders if they were aware of him yet. Ah, the timing here couldn't be worse. He noramlly is smoother than this. Normally he would brush off such a suggestion with an embarrassed laugh and some excuse about how embarrassing it would be for this to be his reunion with someone, or otherwise to feign not knowing her at all, and certainly that he couldn't have anyone over to his apartment that he didn't trust. But he's high on drugs and not thinking clearly, and so what immediately comes out instead is - ]
Yukizome-chan? No, she wouldn't want to see me.
[ Nor does he want to see her. Really, it wouldn't do for him to survive being stabbed only to be smothered by a pillow or something equally ridiculous because somebody was holding a silly grudge. ]
Edited (I'M SO SORRY I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME) 2021-12-05 02:25 (UTC)
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no subject
What was he planning on doing if Komaeda didn't answer...? Well, isn't that obvious? Hiyori would have been shook from his slumber by a lack of oxygen, shifted his head to the side, and continued his soft snoring. As it is, whatever they had given him is strong enough that no normal person would have been left alone on it - and no doubt if they thought he'd be texting a random patient on it, Hiyori would not have been either. Yet, he looks up with his chin rested on the pillow, continuing, ]
Komaeda-kun is my wife tonight...!? Ahh, I'm so blessed... ♡
[ To his credit, this truly is the most content Komaeda might have seen him outside of the hospital - he was always a little tense, even during his most relaxed state, aware yet occasionally not aware of an upcoming threat. But now, well - it's the same as his career. None of the above seems to matter. Not his name, not his image, not his career, no his ambitions and paranoia... There truly is just Sou Hiyori, plain and simple. ]
Komaeda-kun...! Cheap takeout is fine, so just order something...
[ He holds out his hand, and it's clear that he doesn't realize quite yet that his phone has been taken. He seems to realize the same after several seconds, blinking, but undeterred. ]
Hmhmhm... I think Chinese take out is traditional... Ahh, a night with Komaeda-kun.... If you're my wife, can I call you Nagito-kun...? ♡♡♡♡♡♡
[ Perhaps it's because of his rich upbringing, but he seems a little excused at the idea. Whatever the case, he certainly seems pleased about the idea in his head. But with that said, he seems to have exhausted all of his efforts, so he's going to turn his head to the side (visibly flinching as he shifts positions despite it al) turning his face to the TV side as he waits for Komaeda to join him.
That said, he is also going to edge himself over a little and stretch out his hand to take the box. It takes a little more effort than it should, but he does manage to take it. It's his one bit of true competence for the day.
Thank God he's not going to remember any of this because no amount of hope would save him from death by embarrassment. ]
no subject
[ have you ever seen somebody wither so quickly? Probably, but it's still impressive how quickly the disappointment sets in. Komaeda is a nice name, but so is Nagito. Hiyori thinks he'd like to have that level of intimacy. He considers the little box for a moment before slowly forcing himself up and into a proper sitting position, not quite letting his back touch the back of the sofa, setting it on his lap. ]
Usually, yes... I've never been married, though... It's been hard for me to maintain a relationship for very long.
[ But not always. There were those who were older who didn't, and there were those who had their own reasons for choosing not to drop them. It's not very common in this day and age though, and he can't think of many who he's met who would fit that criteria. As for himself, Hiyori has never reached that level of closeness with another person. There was always too much of a gap, and even his long term relationships were brief. They were there and gone in the blink of an eye, just as Komaeda would be.
He doesn't mind that, though, and even if he did there's not terribly much that bothers him right now. It really is like watching a little kid as he stares down at the box, trying to decide on the exact right moment to open it. He looks up as Komaeda starts to pick up the containers. As expected, there's empty sweets containers, though to his credit it does seem as though he's made some effort to find things with actual nutrients (though perhaps somebody else had aided him with that effort.)
There's dust on the furniture, and it's just a bit more unkempt than usual - based on the miscellany, he seems to have been taking things and then forgetting about them. He had his bedroom fixed, and the rest of the house cleaned then, but it's been left as is since. There's a bottle of pills mixed in with all the other items. But Hiyori himself doesn't seem as well kept as usual either - the slightly glazed look, the way his hair is kept down and just a bit messy from being slept on, the simple sleep set... Compared to how pristine and put together he normally is, it's quite the change.
Even so, he seems calmer than normal, without the tension that constantly pulled at him. There's no checking the time every few minutes, no busily moving from one thing to the next, no crunching every second and planning out five steps ahead while perfecting matching himself to every situation.
There's just that dreamy smile as he opens the box to see the adorable gift that Komaeda had gotten him. It's the exact kind of delightful little treat that he might have picked up for himself if he saw it, though it seems a bit too personalized for that. He blinks slowly, taking it in. It's almost too pretty to eat (though he no doubt would before long anyway.) ]
... Ah... I love it...
no subject
You're right. No, no kids... My patients are enough for me.
[ It's fortunate that he doesn't have any particular desire for children, because Hiyori could in no way commit to the responsibility. ]
I wouldn't mind having a cat, though, or maybe a dog.
[ Though he wouldn't own one of those, either, due to the way that he lives his life. His job and his patients are enough. It was enough for him to continue moving up in the world, and it was enough for him to care for himself. He's happy with this way of living. He shakes out a couple of pills into his hand before replacing the cap. The pills sit in his hand, and he stares down at them blearily. When had he taken his last dose...? He struggles to remember.
He does glance up, though, the more pressing issue at hand finally catching up with him. ]
Ah, Komaeda-kun, do you need a hairband? I keep some in the bathroom, but you really don't need to trouble yourself - I just haven't been able to have anyone over...
[ He stands up, a little wobbly but away enough. He did use a cleaning service, but it might not be hard to imagine why he wouldn't be eager to let anyone in given his present condition. It might have been preferable for him to stay in the hospital for longer if he hadn't insisted that he would have another person to care for him while he was out of sorts, and that it would pose no issue; he had already given his spare apartment key to someone.
But he was losing huge chunks of time and couldn't even get it scheduled, much less coordinate with another person to have them come over. ]
no subject
Ah... Alright, Komaeda-kun...
[ He really is out of it. He watches as Komaeda leaves the room. He does check the time now and, finding it to be about right, pops the pills in his mouth and takes a few sips from a half-empty glass of water to wash them down. He lets out a small sigh as he lays back down, on his side now, watching the dimmed and unchanging screen. They had instructed him to avoid moving more than necessary, and sitting up was hard (but then, so was everything.)
It shouldn't be too much trouble to find the hairbands in the bathroom. They're tucked away in a drawer under the sink, along with a couple hairbrushes and other accessories. There's a pair of containers, one with simple black bands while the other has an assortment of colors. ]
no subject
[ Which does appear to be true for the most part, and one can only imagine the agony he would be in right now without painkillers, but unfortunately it also allows him to do stupid things like lean forward so he's halfway on his stomach and stretching over as far as he can on the coffee table to grab the remote there. Naturally, all of the above puts strain on his back, and in the process of this he very nearly just flops forward onto the floor.
He's just going to hang out there, halfway off the couch, with one arm stretched out on the coffee table with the remote in hand and the other on the floor for a minute here until his newest wave of dizziness passes. It was probably a bad idea, but that fact doesn't quite occur to him. One can only hope that he does not remember even a single moment of his time spent in this state or the embarrassment truly will kill him.
He laughs weakly, and it comes about ten seconds later than it should. Truly, Komaeda is seeing the best of the Ultimate Surgeon today. ]
Ahahaha... Just give me a moment...
[ ... He meant well, at least? ]
no subject
Really... It would be nice to have a person around. Hiyori wonders why he never has now, and perhaps if he were always this mentally empty he could. For now he smiles that dreamy smile, but he truly does seem content. This is, after all, everything he'd hoped for. ]
... You're right. I'm sorry Komaeda-kun. I'm...
[ He falls silent for a moment. Even now, in a half aware state, somehow admitting to being alone feels like too much. It's too sad for anyone. He was still in contact with his parents, of course, but he hadn't told them what occurred. They were kind and loving, but busy, so busy, just like him. So that smile falters before returning as he feels fingers brushing his hair back. It's so warm, so comforting... It doesn't matter what it is, he just wants to touch this person. He just wants to feel their touch on him. ]
Well, I suppose I'm just used to caring for others! But... I just want to think about Komaeda-kun right now... Because I love you more than anyone...
no subject
Red and blue... He closes his eyes briefly, losing track of his original thoughts as the conversation moves on. ]
Black pepper steak...? Ah, I've never tried that, but if Komaeda-kun recommends it then I will.
[ He's relatively still now, seeming to have found a comfortable position, though his head raises slightly as he yawns before settling back down, and his sluggish thoughts finally remind him to answer the original question. It's a little out of order, but perhaps it doesn't matter. He needed the extra time to properly think on it, and even now he can't quite do so. But the answer is simple and honest, and it rolls off his tongue easily, ]
I love you, Komaeda-kun.
[ The rest is more complicated. If he were in the right state, he might be able to affirm Komaeda's thought; the world was gray and dull, devoid of all color. It was boring and simple, and he his genius meant that he needed to make his own entertainment at all times. What hope was there for a person who could learn any skill, who could take anything that they desired, and who could overcome any obstacle? He had built himself up so far that everything seemed trivial. He breathes out a little sigh. ]
My talent can't be replicated... No, I have a natural talent that no one will match... Hm, I suppose you'd need to artificially replicate it, then...
[ He murmurs these incomprehensible things, which would no doubt make sense if only he had the sense of mind for them to do so. As it is, they're just the remnants of whatever he's been puzzling through. It doesn't matter, in the end, if talent is man made or artificial. But he's curious to see the effects of the latter. Would it bend, would it break, would it succeed? Would they grow as bored with the world as him? Would it an even grayer and emptier world than his own? Ahhh... There was truly no hope for those who could only watch from above...
Those thoughts come and go quickly now. His world has red and blue, which meld together to form purple. It has a botch of green hitting against black and white. A drug-induced happiness is still a form of happiness. ]
I love you, Komaeda-kun, [ He repeats, ] I'm never bored with you... Ahaha... I'm always so happy...
[ And for somebody who was so difficult to match, that was a rare treat. ]
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Wouldn't that be wonderful? Wouldn't it be amazing? To create the perfect human, to become a perfect replication, to no longer have to worry about heirs and replacements and injury and death. There were other uses for such creations and technology, but those were the ones of particular interest to him. Ah, but even if one were to disregard that, the thought of what changes could be made to the human mind using technology! Erasing and adding memories as one pleased, extensive rewiring... There were no limits to what work could be done.
That, too, is why the Ultimate Surgeon's work would never be done, and this is just a brief reprieve from it. He laughs softly, and even through his mental haze Hiyori thinks just briefly that he'd like Komaeda to see how much potential humans have. ]
Mm... If it's not, we'll make it so.
[ He blinks slowly as Komaeda continues on. ]
Hm? I'm not making anything difficult.
[ He murmurs, seeming puzzled by that claim. His statement is not quite right either, he is fact making many things difficult for many people, but in this particular case Hiyori is coming up blank. Though speaking of coming up blank... He probably had an answer to that question at one point or another, but he seems to have lost it in the midst of all the subject changes and nearly breaking an arm. He will part his lips when prompted though, continuing to murmur, more to himself this time, ]
What did I want...?
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Though he will admit, that beautiful scarlet that had stained his world at Hope's Peak had been the most beautiful of all.
But even so, he prefers the shades of red and blue that Komaeda brings into his life, the way that they mix into purple. ]
If it's somebody Namida chose for you, I'm sure they'll do their job well.
[ He no doubt knows it's inevitable that he would be transferred, but it still stings a little to hear. No doubt the would be one of the most skilled in the field, but nonetheless a disappointment his eeyes
Speaking of his desires and actions... He rubs his face against Komaeda's lap like the drugged up weirdo that he is. ]
Bu~ut I can still take you back, you know~ ♡
[ Actually he can't for another several weeks, but details. He seems enthusiastic enough about it. ]
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The question takes him a little longer to answer, as he's sluggish to process it. Work on someone else...? ]
Maybe...
[ His tone suggests that he's making an effort to politely refuse that suggestion. ]
I don't take many patients... That's why I can give them the best care possible.
[ He had more than enough money to satisfy him, and ASUNARO paid as well as his job. Hiyori only needed to take those cases that interested him enough to do so, those where his talents could be put to use, and then occasionally in the interest of doing business with a person who could make him a particularly good offer. That wasn't terribly common, though, he was no longer the Ultimate Surgeon and so there was no need for anyone to approach him.
But truthfully, the spot that Komaeda had taken was empty for some time before him. ]
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He lifts his hand off of Komaeda's thigh, groping around for Komaeda's hand so that he might place his hand over it. ]
... Mm. I'd be happy if you did, Komaeda-kun.
[ He shifts a little, trying to look up at him properly. ]
Nothing bad will happen to you as long as I'm here because you made me a god, remember...?
[ Though he's only as much of one as before - although, perhaps not quite. He had killed and controlled before, but now he had survived death as well, so perhaps it truly could be called a god. But that hardly mattered. He wouldn't let anything happen, and if it did, he would fix it. He would figure something out. ]
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But none of that seems to matter, no more than the movie in the background or the thought of eating, or even the oncoming storm. There's only the warm feeling of Komaeda's lap, the small smile that graces Komaeda's lips, the sight of his green eyes. Emerald green eyes, beautiful despite their emptiness. Dementia patients are like gemstones, and he wonders if Komaeda isn't more like an emerald than a diamond - a hard stone that's durability is ruined by the fractures and inclusions scattered throughout it. If only he were allowed to, Hiyori will fill in every crack and transform him into something entirely different.
If the Ultimate Surgeon were allowed to play God with him, he could be revived as a human once more. He could just be another person, loved by others. ]
That's alright... I have what you brought me! [ that's not nutritionally sound at all but details. ] Just as long as you're here, Komaeda-kun. [ He slowly moves his head back and forth, nuzzling his nose against the other's. ] It's been lonely.
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He wonders if they were aware of him yet. Ah, the timing here couldn't be worse. He noramlly is smoother than this. Normally he would brush off such a suggestion with an embarrassed laugh and some excuse about how embarrassing it would be for this to be his reunion with someone, or otherwise to feign not knowing her at all, and certainly that he couldn't have anyone over to his apartment that he didn't trust. But he's high on drugs and not thinking clearly, and so what immediately comes out instead is - ]
Yukizome-chan? No, she wouldn't want to see me.
[ Nor does he want to see her. Really, it wouldn't do for him to survive being stabbed only to be smothered by a pillow or something equally ridiculous because somebody was holding a silly grudge. ]
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when are you going to stop ntring me nms go back 2 ur majority game tag
FIVE TIMES EACH THREAD i'm starting to feel second hand sexual frustration tbqh
WELL YEAH BUT IS KOMAEDA GONNA FINALLY RESOLVE THE TENSION AFTER HE'S NOT CRIPPLED AND/OR DRUGGED???
IT'S FINE IT'LL JUST BE A REWARD FOR GOOD BEHAVIOR
THEY CAN FUCK MORE THAN ONCE???? AS A PATIENT THEN AS A BF THEN AS A HUSBAND
OKAY FINE TEMPORARY EX-PATIENT BUT THEN AS A PATIENT HE CAN DO BOTH
okay you know what that's fair, komaeda shouldn't have to settle like that
does that mean their first time can be in his office while he's shirking his duties
that's true maybe he won't moan into the phone this time