[ He doesn't get the chance to point out that he likely knows the doctor he's seeing now and could likely ask for him back before he's cut off by Komaeda. Hiyori can't be upset with that, though, not when Komaeda's showing him affection like this (and more generally, really.) It's hard with his current limitations.
The question takes him a little longer to answer, as he's sluggish to process it. Work on someone else...? ]
Maybe...
[ His tone suggests that he's making an effort to politely refuse that suggestion. ]
I don't take many patients... That's why I can give them the best care possible.
[ He had more than enough money to satisfy him, and ASUNARO paid as well as his job. Hiyori only needed to take those cases that interested him enough to do so, those where his talents could be put to use, and then occasionally in the interest of doing business with a person who could make him a particularly good offer. That wasn't terribly common, though, he was no longer the Ultimate Surgeon and so there was no need for anyone to approach him.
But truthfully, the spot that Komaeda had taken was empty for some time before him. ]
[ Hiyori doesn't like unfinished business, and he doesn't like untreated patients, but he is once more unable to say so due to his own sluggish pace combined with the rapid changes in topic and circumstances. He listens patiently instead, blinking slowly. He should eat, but it doesn't seem like any particular problem if he doesn't; the painkillers suppressed his appetite, and he supposes he must still have some instant ramen bowls hidden somewhere about.
He lifts his hand off of Komaeda's thigh, groping around for Komaeda's hand so that he might place his hand over it. ]
... Mm. I'd be happy if you did, Komaeda-kun.
[ He shifts a little, trying to look up at him properly. ]
Nothing bad will happen to you as long as I'm here because you made me a god, remember...?
[ Though he's only as much of one as before - although, perhaps not quite. He had killed and controlled before, but now he had survived death as well, so perhaps it truly could be called a god. But that hardly mattered. He wouldn't let anything happen, and if it did, he would fix it. He would figure something out. ]
[ He's too fuzzy headed to find an accurate response to that claim, but Hiyori inherently understands that he has no desire to be God if warnings are all that he can offer. He had already given so many, after all.
But none of that seems to matter, no more than the movie in the background or the thought of eating, or even the oncoming storm. There's only the warm feeling of Komaeda's lap, the small smile that graces Komaeda's lips, the sight of his green eyes. Emerald green eyes, beautiful despite their emptiness. Dementia patients are like gemstones, and he wonders if Komaeda isn't more like an emerald than a diamond - a hard stone that's durability is ruined by the fractures and inclusions scattered throughout it. If only he were allowed to, Hiyori will fill in every crack and transform him into something entirely different.
If the Ultimate Surgeon were allowed to play God with him, he could be revived as a human once more. He could just be another person, loved by others. ]
That's alright... I have what you brought me! [ that's not nutritionally sound at all but details. ] Just as long as you're here, Komaeda-kun. [ He slowly moves his head back and forth, nuzzling his nose against the other's. ] It's been lonely.
[ The name Yukizome gives him a pause. He blinks slowly as Komaeda is speaking, trying to put the name to a face, and when he finally does his smile twitches a bit. Was it the same one? It wasn't such an uncommon surname that it couldn't be another, but just the possibility is enough to make him uncomfortable. Without a doubt, the name and talent matched.
He wonders if they were aware of him yet. Ah, the timing here couldn't be worse. He noramlly is smoother than this. Normally he would brush off such a suggestion with an embarrassed laugh and some excuse about how embarrassing it would be for this to be his reunion with someone, or otherwise to feign not knowing her at all, and certainly that he couldn't have anyone over to his apartment that he didn't trust. But he's high on drugs and not thinking clearly, and so what immediately comes out instead is - ]
Yukizome-chan? No, she wouldn't want to see me.
[ Nor does he want to see her. Really, it wouldn't do for him to survive being stabbed only to be smothered by a pillow or something equally ridiculous because somebody was holding a silly grudge. ]
Edited (I'M SO SORRY I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME) 2021-12-05 02:25 (UTC)
[ How fortunate. He wasn't terribly looking forward to the consequences of that phone call. He flinches when the phone is dropped, though he lifts it up to look at. That was quick, though perhaps it was just his skewed sense of time that made him think it so. Hiyori pushes himself up into a sitting position carefully, finding the motion less painful this time. The newest dose must be kicking in.
He supposes it inevitable that Komaeda would continue to loop back around to the idea of him being around Ultimates, but not even drugs are enough to keep that idea from making him sick - but especially those who knew him in those days. They had no desire to see him. There was no way he could expect Komaeda to understand that, though. ]
[ Komaeda, he thinks, is less of a wife and more akin to a parent fussing over their child. It's a bit embarrassing for an adult to be treated as such, even if he's not that much older. It was impressive how fast he'd accumulated his talent and put it into practice. He listens to the sound of footsteps as he lays there, to the door opening, and the storm settling in. Cracks of thunder followed by the heavy sounds of rain falling.
Hiyori doesn't care for strong storms, but he likes rainy days. Quiet mornings where the sun is clouded and rain patters against the window, when he can lay under the covers and just listen to it as he puts off getting up for too long, before eventually sitting near the window with his coffee in hand and a phone showing the news in the other. But he's always hated weather like this.
He lays there for a few moments longer than he should before he nods, once more forcing himself to sit up and reaching to take the bag and pull it onto his lap. ]
[ The bag is set next to him for the moment, the popped off, and he picks at it. It takes him longer than it should, as he doesn't quite have his normal dexterity, but it was a good choice. He doesn't mind other flavors, so long as it's not too spicy, but he favors sweetness above all else. He logically understands that it's a far better choice for him than the simple sugars he's favored now more than ever.
Normally he could at least force himself to eat proper meals when he had the mindset for it, understanding the importance of nutritional balance (despite always treating himself after,) but at present simple sugars were far easier for him to consume. It was too hard to cook, it was too hard to order, it was too much effort to go through all the steps. He'd made some effort now, but without a doubt he would have just popped pills and water and stayed on the sofa all night if not for Komaeda's efforts. ]
Of course not. I'm happy, Komaeda-kun, because Komaeda-kun is here!
[ He shifts his chopsticks to the opposite hand so he can reach over to stroke Komaeda's hair for a few moments. There's a twinge of pain as he leans, but nothing enough to deter him. ]
[ noooo not moving his hand back... Hiyori makes no effort to object, nodding along as he's given instructions. He would never do anything that undignified, it's fine, it's fine...
He considers the statement and to his credit, he does manage to finish chewing and swallowing before he answers - if only for the length of time that it takes him to come up with one. ]
I had my eyes on Komaeda-kun the entire time, didn't I? So I couldn't think much else...
[ It's not a lie. For the extent of how much he could focus on anyone or anything, it had been the person who had stabbed him. The person who had spoken to him, kissed him, laid his head on their lap while he was still conscious. ]
Hmm... Maybe I wanted my mother to come save me, too...?
[ That was even more common. For those who had a mother who had reared them, they would think of them in those threatening times, ever wanting the person who had always saved them to do so then.
For Hiyori, too, his mother had always been the one who had cared for him. His parents were strict and had expected the world of him, but they had been loving all the same, offering him only the best care and education in his youth. They had kept him out of trouble at all times. They had helped to handle the situation at Hope's Peak.
Ah, he remembers how his mother used to stroke his hair, and tell him how proud she was... How wonderful he'd done... The way his normally strong and composed mother had held him and cried when he was invited to join those elites...
How she hadn't blamed him at all for what had happened.
He can't say for certain. He can't remember clearly enough to do so. But even now, he wishes she were here too, that she'd stroke his hair and tell him how foolish he was for winding up in such a predicament... How he had too much life ahead, how she wanted to see him rise to even greater heights, to follow his every success, to see so much more of him...
He pauses his movements as he thinks about this, staring down blankly at the container in his lap. ]
[ It wasn't something that he hid, exactly, so much as a fact that would never come up in conversations. Hiyori kept to himself, never disclosing the facts of his personal life, and there was no real sense in doing so except to extract sympathy from others. And without a doubt, if he had more presence of mind, he would have made a point of avoiding the suggestion with Komaeda in particular.
His mother was a wonderful woman who had lived her life to the fullest. His parents were kind and loving, but they were busy and prideful. They had raised a brilliant young prodigy who had, after just a few years, surpassed almost all others in his field. Hiyori thinks back to the last time he had seen his mother. She was more proud of him then than ever. Her passing was sad, but he's had enough time to mourn. ]
She passed about a year ago... Hm, but I don't know if I actually thought of her.
[ He's just making a logical assumption, really. ]
I only remember Komaeda-kun... I think about you all the time.
[ As the ten texts sent to him throughout the day might suggest. ]
[ He had paused briefly as Komaeda spoke, chopsticks hovering above the container, but he continues when prompted. There was a brief moment upon hearing that his heart belonged to another, but in the end reality had sunk in and he realized that it was not him at all. It was not Sou Hiyori, nor his hope, or his talent, but the title. The title of one who had been arbitrarily chosen as the best.
He laughs softly as he thinks on that. Drugs can even cure the wounds of the heart, but even so, he's aware of them. ]
Hmhmhm... Living this way really is so much nicer! Yes, I'm sure this is happiness.
[ Living without the title of the Ultimate Surgeon. Ah, even his proof is gone... Wouldn't it be nice if it was smashed to pieces and erased forever? ]
[ It takes him some effort, but he manages to get through the remainder of his meal, leaving just a few bites. It was too much for one sitting, but then he hadn't been in a habit of doing so. Happiness... Yes, he could find happiness like this. He is happy like this, as Sou Hiyori, as a skilled surgeon.
He's happier now than ever before. ]
Mhm! I'm happy now because you're here...
[ He sets the container down on the table and carefully slides down onto the floor while Komaeda's distracted and lays his head on his shoulder at the first available opportunity. It hurts a little, but it's nothing more than a dull ache by now, even though the pain must be excruciating in actuality. ]
You shouldn't take pills that aren't prescribed to you, Komaeda-kun.
[ It's a light statement, more than likely pulling from memory and nothing more. At the very least, he doesn't seem inclined to stop him. The bottle is nearly full. It's a top of the line product, one that was prohibitively expressive and difficult to get a prescription for, and the effects speak for themselves. Hiyori is nuzzling against his shoulder now, seeming to not have a single thought in his head now that he's had a moment to clear his thoughts. ]
[ Not for himself...? Hiyori accepts that without a second thought, returns the kiss without thinking about it, he parts his lips to invite Komaeda in without a thought, and without a second thought he--
...!?
There's a confused little noise as he feels the pills on his tongue. He must have enough sense of mind left to find something wrong with the sudden addition - he had been able to keep track of when he had last took them, after all, albeit he only remembered to set the alarm for the next dose half the time and wound up depending more on when the pain returned and his own cloudy memory. But he can at least understand that he's taken one recently, and that this is not the proper way to do so.
Hiyori tries to pull away so he can spit them out. It's a weak and clumsy effort at best - said previous dose was showing its effectiveness by now. Even more than when he had a knife in his back, when he could at least utilize the sharp skills that he'd developed over the years and push through what had been done to him, the Ultimate Surgeon truly does seem helpless now. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
no subject
The question takes him a little longer to answer, as he's sluggish to process it. Work on someone else...? ]
Maybe...
[ His tone suggests that he's making an effort to politely refuse that suggestion. ]
I don't take many patients... That's why I can give them the best care possible.
[ He had more than enough money to satisfy him, and ASUNARO paid as well as his job. Hiyori only needed to take those cases that interested him enough to do so, those where his talents could be put to use, and then occasionally in the interest of doing business with a person who could make him a particularly good offer. That wasn't terribly common, though, he was no longer the Ultimate Surgeon and so there was no need for anyone to approach him.
But truthfully, the spot that Komaeda had taken was empty for some time before him. ]
no subject
He lifts his hand off of Komaeda's thigh, groping around for Komaeda's hand so that he might place his hand over it. ]
... Mm. I'd be happy if you did, Komaeda-kun.
[ He shifts a little, trying to look up at him properly. ]
Nothing bad will happen to you as long as I'm here because you made me a god, remember...?
[ Though he's only as much of one as before - although, perhaps not quite. He had killed and controlled before, but now he had survived death as well, so perhaps it truly could be called a god. But that hardly mattered. He wouldn't let anything happen, and if it did, he would fix it. He would figure something out. ]
no subject
But none of that seems to matter, no more than the movie in the background or the thought of eating, or even the oncoming storm. There's only the warm feeling of Komaeda's lap, the small smile that graces Komaeda's lips, the sight of his green eyes. Emerald green eyes, beautiful despite their emptiness. Dementia patients are like gemstones, and he wonders if Komaeda isn't more like an emerald than a diamond - a hard stone that's durability is ruined by the fractures and inclusions scattered throughout it. If only he were allowed to, Hiyori will fill in every crack and transform him into something entirely different.
If the Ultimate Surgeon were allowed to play God with him, he could be revived as a human once more. He could just be another person, loved by others. ]
That's alright... I have what you brought me! [ that's not nutritionally sound at all but details. ] Just as long as you're here, Komaeda-kun. [ He slowly moves his head back and forth, nuzzling his nose against the other's. ] It's been lonely.
no subject
He wonders if they were aware of him yet. Ah, the timing here couldn't be worse. He noramlly is smoother than this. Normally he would brush off such a suggestion with an embarrassed laugh and some excuse about how embarrassing it would be for this to be his reunion with someone, or otherwise to feign not knowing her at all, and certainly that he couldn't have anyone over to his apartment that he didn't trust. But he's high on drugs and not thinking clearly, and so what immediately comes out instead is - ]
Yukizome-chan? No, she wouldn't want to see me.
[ Nor does he want to see her. Really, it wouldn't do for him to survive being stabbed only to be smothered by a pillow or something equally ridiculous because somebody was holding a silly grudge. ]
no subject
He supposes it inevitable that Komaeda would continue to loop back around to the idea of him being around Ultimates, but not even drugs are enough to keep that idea from making him sick - but especially those who knew him in those days. They had no desire to see him. There was no way he could expect Komaeda to understand that, though. ]
Ah, that was quick, wasn't it...?
no subject
Hiyori doesn't care for strong storms, but he likes rainy days. Quiet mornings where the sun is clouded and rain patters against the window, when he can lay under the covers and just listen to it as he puts off getting up for too long, before eventually sitting near the window with his coffee in hand and a phone showing the news in the other. But he's always hated weather like this.
He lays there for a few moments longer than he should before he nods, once more forcing himself to sit up and reaching to take the bag and pull it onto his lap. ]
Komaeda-kun?
no subject
Normally he could at least force himself to eat proper meals when he had the mindset for it, understanding the importance of nutritional balance (despite always treating himself after,) but at present simple sugars were far easier for him to consume. It was too hard to cook, it was too hard to order, it was too much effort to go through all the steps. He'd made some effort now, but without a doubt he would have just popped pills and water and stayed on the sofa all night if not for Komaeda's efforts. ]
Of course not. I'm happy, Komaeda-kun, because Komaeda-kun is here!
[ He shifts his chopsticks to the opposite hand so he can reach over to stroke Komaeda's hair for a few moments. There's a twinge of pain as he leans, but nothing enough to deter him. ]
I'm happy...
no subject
He considers the statement and to his credit, he does manage to finish chewing and swallowing before he answers - if only for the length of time that it takes him to come up with one. ]
I had my eyes on Komaeda-kun the entire time, didn't I? So I couldn't think much else...
[ It's not a lie. For the extent of how much he could focus on anyone or anything, it had been the person who had stabbed him. The person who had spoken to him, kissed him, laid his head on their lap while he was still conscious. ]
Hmm... Maybe I wanted my mother to come save me, too...?
[ That was even more common. For those who had a mother who had reared them, they would think of them in those threatening times, ever wanting the person who had always saved them to do so then.
For Hiyori, too, his mother had always been the one who had cared for him. His parents were strict and had expected the world of him, but they had been loving all the same, offering him only the best care and education in his youth. They had kept him out of trouble at all times. They had helped to handle the situation at Hope's Peak.
Ah, he remembers how his mother used to stroke his hair, and tell him how proud she was... How wonderful he'd done... The way his normally strong and composed mother had held him and cried when he was invited to join those elites...
How she hadn't blamed him at all for what had happened.
He can't say for certain. He can't remember clearly enough to do so. But even now, he wishes she were here too, that she'd stroke his hair and tell him how foolish he was for winding up in such a predicament... How he had too much life ahead, how she wanted to see him rise to even greater heights, to follow his every success, to see so much more of him...
He pauses his movements as he thinks about this, staring down blankly at the container in his lap. ]
no subject
His mother was a wonderful woman who had lived her life to the fullest. His parents were kind and loving, but they were busy and prideful. They had raised a brilliant young prodigy who had, after just a few years, surpassed almost all others in his field. Hiyori thinks back to the last time he had seen his mother. She was more proud of him then than ever. Her passing was sad, but he's had enough time to mourn. ]
She passed about a year ago... Hm, but I don't know if I actually thought of her.
[ He's just making a logical assumption, really. ]
I only remember Komaeda-kun... I think about you all the time.
[ As the ten texts sent to him throughout the day might suggest. ]
no subject
[ He had paused briefly as Komaeda spoke, chopsticks hovering above the container, but he continues when prompted. There was a brief moment upon hearing that his heart belonged to another, but in the end reality had sunk in and he realized that it was not him at all. It was not Sou Hiyori, nor his hope, or his talent, but the title. The title of one who had been arbitrarily chosen as the best.
He laughs softly as he thinks on that. Drugs can even cure the wounds of the heart, but even so, he's aware of them. ]
Hmhmhm... Living this way really is so much nicer! Yes, I'm sure this is happiness.
[ Living without the title of the Ultimate Surgeon. Ah, even his proof is gone... Wouldn't it be nice if it was smashed to pieces and erased forever? ]
no subject
He's happier now than ever before. ]
Mhm! I'm happy now because you're here...
[ He sets the container down on the table and carefully slides down onto the floor while Komaeda's distracted and lays his head on his shoulder at the first available opportunity. It hurts a little, but it's nothing more than a dull ache by now, even though the pain must be excruciating in actuality. ]
You shouldn't take pills that aren't prescribed to you, Komaeda-kun.
[ It's a light statement, more than likely pulling from memory and nothing more. At the very least, he doesn't seem inclined to stop him. The bottle is nearly full. It's a top of the line product, one that was prohibitively expressive and difficult to get a prescription for, and the effects speak for themselves. Hiyori is nuzzling against his shoulder now, seeming to not have a single thought in his head now that he's had a moment to clear his thoughts. ]
no subject
...!?
There's a confused little noise as he feels the pills on his tongue. He must have enough sense of mind left to find something wrong with the sudden addition - he had been able to keep track of when he had last took them, after all, albeit he only remembered to set the alarm for the next dose half the time and wound up depending more on when the pain returned and his own cloudy memory. But he can at least understand that he's taken one recently, and that this is not the proper way to do so.
Hiyori tries to pull away so he can spit them out. It's a weak and clumsy effort at best - said previous dose was showing its effectiveness by now. Even more than when he had a knife in his back, when he could at least utilize the sharp skills that he'd developed over the years and push through what had been done to him, the Ultimate Surgeon truly does seem helpless now. ]
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
when are you going to stop ntring me nms go back 2 ur majority game tag
FIVE TIMES EACH THREAD i'm starting to feel second hand sexual frustration tbqh
WELL YEAH BUT IS KOMAEDA GONNA FINALLY RESOLVE THE TENSION AFTER HE'S NOT CRIPPLED AND/OR DRUGGED???
IT'S FINE IT'LL JUST BE A REWARD FOR GOOD BEHAVIOR
THEY CAN FUCK MORE THAN ONCE???? AS A PATIENT THEN AS A BF THEN AS A HUSBAND
OKAY FINE TEMPORARY EX-PATIENT BUT THEN AS A PATIENT HE CAN DO BOTH
okay you know what that's fair, komaeda shouldn't have to settle like that
does that mean their first time can be in his office while he's shirking his duties
that's true maybe he won't moan into the phone this time