( closed to @luck ) your turn to die: sou hiyori

[killed]

With varying vanities, from every part, they shift the moving toyshop of their heart.

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I'M JUST SICK ABOUT IT

[killed]

[ It is a myth. It's just a story he'd heard about from a passing folklorist. Hiyori no longer remembers when or which one it was, just that he had mentioned it once he found out that he was a twin. He'd laughed and brushed it off as a mere story, but he made a small mistake in mentioning another ritual in passing. It was just a few words, but more than enough for the youth to latch onto, enough to see that pained look on his face and the way that he suddenly clamped out. They were just slight, subtle sighs of guilt and trauma, but despite his young age he's already been trained to recognizes.

He looks up at those subtle expressions on Komaeda now, the way his fingers rub against his neck rather than tightening, but he already knows it'll be the same as always. He pushes their relationship a little further each time, letting his fingers and kisses wander to new places, the tones becoming all that more affectionate, but that singular offer has remained the same. Those few words, the same light squeeze before the affection that follows, and Hiyori wraps his arms around the back of his neck to pull him in for another kiss so he can whisper the same words to him as always. ]

... I'd still adore you with your hands around my neck, I'd love you until the last breath left my lungs... Even after that, because then we could be together forever...

[ Hiyori would be unhealthy in any world. There's no life in which a child had such pressure placed upon them and a life decided for them before they're even born in which they don't struggle. The only difference in this one is that he has an anchor. Once upon a time he would shed a few tears when the pressure and reminders of his importance caught up with him, when he still questioned why they were so different despite being born together, before that changed into soft kisses and shared nights and words of love as he settled more and more into who he should be.

But he still thinks it's a nice idea. Hiyori doesn't want to die, the idea scares him far too much, but it's nice to think of being completed. They could become one soul, the twin wings of a crimson butterfly; one who purifies the earth, one who watches over it, but they're rejoined in the end. He should be so willing to accept that pain, because he has to - sometimes it has to hurt a little, sometimes one has to struggle and sacrifice to get what they want, because life is never so easy.

But he sighs a little, knowing that such a train of thought will only cause more friction. He offers an apologetic smile. ]

Sorry, sorry... I understand... Dreams are just dreams, and we must live in reality! ... I won't bring it up again, okay? I promise.

[ That, at least, is new. But he knows - if he keeps asking, if he keeps pushing it, eventually he'll just push Komaeda away from him completely. The idea frightens him. ]

I ALREADY FEEL SICK NGL TO YOU

[killed]

[ They don't. If they did, Hiyori would accept any punishment if only Komaeda would allow him to. But he already knows that the younger of the two wouldn't allow for that, and their family would breathe out a sigh of relief at the opportunity to blame him. It would be easier for them. They would have reason to separate them more permanently, no doubt shipping him off to some boarding school for the children of celebrities and public figures that are meant to be hidden out of sight and out of mind. They would only grow more rigid with him then, and neither of them would have anyone to lean on.

There's a hitch of breath as that hand presses against his stomach, sending a shiver down his spine. There's no one else whose touch can effect him int his way. He'd tried dating others - girls, boys, it doesn't matter, none of them interest him at all. They're all empty and vapid, barely even there, and at times it seems as though he's doing nothing more than passing through crowds of shadows. His twin alone stays out to him in that empty world, showing him brilliant colors and warmth. His body runs cold, but when he holds him he finds himself growing warmer than he could by any fire. ]

Hm, then perhaps I should start wearing a scarf so Nacchan can love me even harder...? Rather than imagining it, I'd rather have you do it yourself... ♡

[ He could shove his love more and more, setting aside thoughts of death in favor of biting and licking and sucking, leaving him hiding it under clothes and accessories. He doesn't mind that thought. He lets his arms move down around the other's waist in turn, one hand sliding under his shirt so his index finger can trail up the curve of his lower back, but it comes to a pause and the smile fades as he considers that question, his hand laying flat so he can hold onto him a little tighter instead.

He doesn't cry anymore, no more than his younger brother does, because he was too old for such things by time he was in elementary school. But his brow furrows and his eyes move down as the reality sinks in more properly, and he has to work to bring them back up. It's only Komaeda who's treated to these small imperfections,t he cracks in his carefully constructed act. ]

At any rate, I told them my thoughts on the matter. I should rather be disowned and see this family's bloodline end with us than continue it in such a foolish way! If nothing more, I can choose my own partner! I can decide who I love, and who I wish to be with, and I have no need for their support. I can build up my own castle - I can build up our castle, one that with walls that none will be able to breach...

[ He hadn't specified who he was interested in, and rather than assume he's been spending time with his twin, they had opted to blame it on a servant girl that the pair had played with when they were younger and are that he still thinks fondly of despite her having moved on. He hadn't corrected that mistake, but the bruise on his cheek promises that they were no happier with the idea. ]

JUST SUMN BOUT IT

[killed]

[ It's rare for him to get into such trouble. It's part of being the golden child. He was raised to be independent and a leader, yet nonetheless conforming to a certain set of standards that was expected of their class. But on the rare ocassion he grows stubborn about something or another, grinding his heels in and arguing until he's hit and sat down and forced to listen to those long lectures. He holds onto the boy in his arms together, letting his fingers grip the fabric of his shirt.

It stings a little bit to hear those words fro his twin's mouth. He's right, of course; his parents are correct as well, just like always, as once this marriage is settled he'll be set for life. He only needs an adequate partner to complete his life, and love need not to be a part of the equation. One doesn't marry for love, after all, but rather learns to love the one that they married. Even so, he wants to be agreed with, to be told they're as ridiculous and unfair as he believes them to be.

The idea of piecing their souls together to form a brilliant red butterfly isn't his dream, but a way to ensure that their wings will never be torn apart again. ]

Pretty, but not nearly as pretty as you are.

[ He lifts a hand to touch his cheek where Komaeda kissed it, as though trying to hold it in place, before finally removing it to brush the hair out of the other's face. ]

If my talent is such that I should be the best... [ He draws in a breath, exhales slowly, ] ... If I'm what they say I am, then I should be able to build up my own castle brick by brick. I could build it for us in a place far from here, one where no one knows us, and we can claim to be a married couple until it can be legalized... It might be difficult, but not all of my connections were built up through our parents. Fiscally might be more difficult, but I've been stashing away in secret for some time now, and it should be enough to get us by for awhile... Then we could spend the rest of our lives together...

[ He's put thought into this. He leaves out the specifics, but without a doubt he's thought of that as well - considered every last detail, written and rewritten the plan dozens of times until it was finally perfect. He plays with a lock of hair, trying to imagine a life in which they can't lay together like this... How empty it would be. ]

You don't think I can do it either, Nacchan...?

[ He knows that's not the problem. He should be grateful this parents and for everything they've done for him, and to run off rather than accept the gifts they received would be the height of childish arrogance. Still... There's some part of him that pulls at hi, that tells him this isn't how things are supposed to be. It's like a wrench thrown into the works, ruining everything that they'd worked so hard for, but what has he ever done save what he should? What has Komaeda ever done but ask for the best for him?

There's no reason he should feel so strongly about this, but he thinks that's love - impossible to argue with, irrational to the point of foolishness, and more strong willed than anything else. But maybe they're right, maybe that too is just a dream that he needs to wake up from. ]

ME KINDA SICK THAT THEY'RE CUTE

[killed]

[ It's difficult. They're twins who share everything, and yet they have to lead completely different lives. Komaeda is treated as nothing more than a stepping stone, something for Hiyori to trample over on his way to the top as he should everyone else. That's why he's treated so differently, subjected to extra lessons every day and pulled along to his parents' events and taught under them. It's why he's treated as a precious gift. It's why he's so frustrated, and those feelings had finally bubbled over because none of it is fair.

He reaches up to touch his cheek, his fingertips brushing against it, and he winces. It's still sore. They had hit hard. He hates pain. He hates that he fell silent when those warnings of far worse things came. If they could share the burden it would be easier, if they could work together and lead together then he would be happier, and if he were given more love then maybe they wouldn't constantly be arguing about whether or not he should seek treatment - because he'd be someone too important to die, he would be too loved for that.

He bites his lip, and before he knows it his arms are empty and that weight that held him down is gone. ]

You're right, iof I wait a few more years, I'll be in a better position. I'll be higher than either of them... They won't be able to tell either of us what to do...

[ His fingers dig into the sheets, taking a fistful of it as he takes a deep breath to steady himself. If he had acted sooner, then it might not have come to this. If he had shown all of them, made a big bang that would change the trajectory of his life, then he knows that everything would be different. He'd thought about it so many times, his fingers itching and the growing frustration with the status quo eating away at him, but at those times his twin and grounded him. Over and over, just by sitting next to him and smiling for him, just by loving him, his hand was stayed.

His nails dig in a little deeper. Maybe he was just waiting until it would matter. They can only make him do it once, and then he can shape the world into what he imagines it to be - what they imagine that it could be. He takes in a deep breath to steady himself.

It only hurts once. But he'd wanted to at least be able to marry the person he loved.

...

He rolls onto his stomach before pushing himself back onto his knees, giving his brother's arm a little tug as he starts to slip out of the bed. ]

... Hey, Nacchan. Come with me.

NOT WHEN HE QUITS THIS STOP!! HE'S JUST GONNA CHEAT ON HIS WIFE

[killed]

[ He has to do better, work harder, learn more, be hurt more until even this abuse means nothing to him. Ending his tears was a star, and the continuing education is nothing more than building up his tolerance. It will continue as he asserts himself more, pushes back, builds up an immunity to it.

He places a hand on his twin's back, guiding him along toward the curtains. He pauses for just a moment, falling silent as he listens for any hint of activity in the house. It's one thing to be caught in bed together. They're too old for it, but it's common among twins to find comfort in that closeness even as adults, and no parent would suspect the truth behind it - not the kisses that go on for too long, saliva trailing between them when they end, or the kisses and bites, the way that hey know each other's bodies so well now.

They can continue later, and Hiyori fixes himself in turn, kissing his cheek when he stops. ]

Yes.. It'll be completely difference once they're no longer here to protect me, won't it? I'll take on all their responsibilities.

[ The duties they split, Hiyori would handle alone. His wife is meant to support him and to elevate him to greater heights, but that meant being able to handle her own sectors without touching his. His talent is so great that they believe he can handle it. He takes his hand off, kissing his twin's cheek as he moves to open the curtain. The windows behind it are massive, ceiling-to-floor walls that look more like grand doorways to enter and exit, letting the moonlight shine down inside. With his back turned, his smile fades for just a moment.

They'd always been together, but he wold need to handle everything alone. They were born together, but they would have to live apart - away from him, with a wife that he already knows he won't share a room with, children that he's never wanted but would need to raise just as he was. But he should be able to at least handle that much.

His smile has returned by time he turns back around, tilting his brother's chin up with his index finger. ]

It's a surprise, so... You have to close your eyes.

I HATE THAT TOO LIKE IMAGINE BEING DITCHED FOR INCEST

[killed]

... Yes... You're right. Thank you, Nacchan.

[ Hiyori kisses his forehead. Those words are warmer, and they come a little easier. They are. In ancient times, sometimes children would even kill their parents to usurp them, but one can only do that after fortifying their castle. He would need a moat solid walls, soldiers and fell conspirators. He doesn't have that yet, he only have a few older servants who look upon them with pity without being able to do anything, but he will soon. He'll do just s Komaeda says, building himself up so high that he can crush even them underheel, so high that he'll never be subject to the whims of another again.

He breathes out a little easier. He takes a few steps away, and there's a certain amount of shuffling and bumping as he looks for what he had hidden in here. Their rooms are too large for them to make use of every piece of it, and so it hadn't been easy for him to find an unused drawer to hide it in. After a minute or so his steps stop in front of his brother again, and he looks down at the object in his hand and the one resting on his shoulder.

He spares the briefest glance outside, and he wonders if the moon would resent itself for only being able to reflect the sun's light. It creates no light, but it is her light that shines brilliantly upon the world even both when the sun shines and when it sets. They're Esau and Jacob, one who can only brighten the human world, and one who has a place both this world and the one to come.

There's the flutter of a as he gingerly unfolds and raises it in an arc above Komaeda. The white sheet, so thin that it's almost translucent, comes to rest on his head and drape off his shoulders. It trails onto the ground, like a veil on a bride. ]

I wish to be with you always, Nacchan, and to be connected with you always... If I could give myself to anyone, it would be you.

[ He takes the other object now and slips his hands around his neck, securing the clasp before of a crescent moon necklace decorated with just a few few blue spinels around his neck. It's nearly a full circle, and if Komaeda were to look he would find that the sun pendant, one with just a single pink spinel in the center, that he wears is meant to neatly fit into its center - the moon holding the sun. It's only then that he taps his shoulder to signify that he can open his eyes, but not before he cupping his twin's chin in his hand and giving him the promised kiss.

Their parents would be sickened if they saw this little display. He had wanted to wait longer, until he could ask Komaeda to exchange vows and promises to be with him always, but there's no longer any time, so... He at least wants to be able to give himself to the person he loves first. ]

Everlasting, true love, I am yours, now and forever.

I KNOW HE CAN'T KEEP GETTING AWAY WITH THIS

[killed]

[ Hands around his neck, and his own hands sliding around Komaeda's waist in return, and it's as though they're truly sharing the first moments of the rest of their life. The ceremony ends with the passionate kiss that follows their vows, the first of so many that will be taken as they walk hand in hand, but nothing can be so easy for two people who come from a prestigious family. It hardly matters that they share the same blood when it would be the same story if he were a commoner, a servant, anything that hadn't been carefully curated for him.

But for the moments that their lips are pressed together in a breathtaking moment of passion all concerns evaporate, the world disappears, and there's only the two of them. Their love is one that can only end in tragedy, as they burn and harm each other just by being close. They'll wind up with marks and scars, be buried alive by their own sins, but what good is there in living in a colorless world where only the lonely survive? What use is there in a world where he can't place one hand over his twin's as he clings to the pendant give to him, pressing his hands against his chest. He takes Komaeda's other hand next, keeping him close. ]

I wanted to wait until I could get you a ring... I thought I would sweep you off your feet and carry you down the aisle, but I suppose that might have been a little ambitious... But I couldn't stand the idea of someone else coming before you.

[ He offers a sheepish smile, the apology written on his face. It's selfish. He squeezes his hands. His twin has been the first for everything. He was the first that Hiyori knew, the first that he held the hand of and hugged, his first kiss, his first marriage, the first and only love that he'll have in this life. There's no rings and no priest to hear their vows, but the night sky to shine on them and a pendant that speaks of his feelings. ]

It's alright if you don't feel the same way, but know that my vows are for Nagito Hiyori alone... If you would have me, I would dedicate my entire life to you, and I would do everything to be able to stay by your side...

[ He trails off, takes in a deep breath. It's frightening when he could be rejected, and rightfully so. There are steps in the process, and he had skipped all of them. But it's more frightening to think of what comes next. It's the most painful route. Every kiss will lead them closer to disaster, every action that follows will only hurt hi more. Their parents aren't violent by any means, but where words fail they find the need to instead act. The bruise on his cheek is nothing to what they're capable of.

It would be less painful if he were to just give up, to accept things as they are and that every effort will only make it hurt more when they fail and his hope is stomped upon over and over, and yet... ]

... Because I can think of nothing that would hurt more than being separated from you.

MEEE HE'S SO EXTRA ABOUT IT TOO

[killed]

[ He's a child who was told he has infinite potential, and so Hiyori began to believe the same. He's always had the confidence to match it, and it seems that only those who crafted him with such care have the ability to erode it. Even that power is starting to ebb now that he's found that precious emotion that both hope and despair are borne from and yet neither can touch. It's love, passionate and pure, that builds him up... Love that he might have lacked in another life, that would be too diluted to do anything but force his hand again and again for its sake.

It's a love for one single person.

He catches the vase with one hand, fumbling it a little but managing to keep it from hitting the ground as he holds it while taking Komaeda's hand in his other. The pendant shines on his neck, never to be taken off, and he wonders if his twin will do the same. He's always been prone to losing things so he might not. It might be locked in a box, and Hiyori would be happy with that too - his love locked away somewhere safe from all harm, a place where no one can sully it with their disgusting eyes and thoughts.

The vase is set down back in place as he bends down in one knee. He has no box to open, no right to give, and so he places his other hand on top of his as he looks at up at him. This moodiness is well known to him, but there's always a reason for it, and Hiyori knows what it is now. It makes him happy when it shouldn't, a disgusting and selfish happiness to know that just the thought of having to share him can upset someone so. ]

You're right, I should do it properly... Nagito Hiyori, will you marry me? Will you stay by my side always, and speak of the future with me...? I can give you no ring, but I promise to dedicate myself to you and you alone. I will love only you, for I only see you in my future.

[ He shakes his head. They're words he's been taught to speak, elegant and sweet and heartfelt, but none that he would give to anyone else. ]

When I look at you, Nacchan, I see more than the you of now. I see the you of tomorrow, and the day after that. I see you in your old age... I see you by my side for as long as we both live, and even after death, for together our souls will remain.

[ He closes his eyes and slides his hand up enough to kiss the back of his hand. ]

I see that future where I make everyone accept us - our mother and father, our family, even God himself will have no choice but to acknowledge us.

[ There's an absolute certainty to those words, a promise and an oath wrapped into one. He has to build himself up over the next few years, do more and work harder, all so that he can force them to. If they won't, he'll crush them under his heel, step on their throat and crush their windpipes until they can no longer speak ill of them. If they write, he'll cut their fingers off one by one, until they have nothing left to give but their blessing. He'll shape the world into what he wishes, one in which they can be together without fear nor shame. ]

THEY'RE SO GROSS sigh i love them anyway, my gross sons

[killed]

[ It should bother him, but it never has. He was taught by his mother and father that they were early on, equal but separate, two different people who had different meaning to the world. What does it matter if they share the same blood then? It's the problem with teaching a child both to be obedient and a leader, they eventually begin to refuse even those values that their parents and the world have impressed upon them in favor of their own desires. Why shouldn't they after amassing such power that none can oppose them?

He shakes his head in response to the question. It scared him a little at first, but they're already past that point. He's already learned that the world is there for him to build up and burn down as he pleases. He only need learn how. But still, the sting that his touch brings reminds him that he's not there. One hand moves up to the one over his cheek, and the sting of it is nothing compared to the words spoken. A year and a half? Just ridiculous. Why is it that they're all against him? Why does no one listen to him!? They'll do nothing but live and die separately! He's not worth living for! It's not worth it to see his future! So why should he listen to any of them? Why shouldn't he - ]

Nacchan... It doesn't matter to me if we're related. Love knows boundaries, and the heart wants what it wants.

[ He closes his eyes and presses his cheek against that hand and he opens his eyes, the warm smile never having budged. His twin is beautiful in the moonlight, wearing the veil for their wedding and a pendant that symbolizes their union. It's breathtaking, enough to washes away everything and anything until there's only him, and it reminds him that such questions are those of a a child abdicating responsibility. Hiyori can do better, he can do more, and when he does he can change everything. He can make them listen, he can cure every illness, and he can break down every wall.

They both have a role to play, but the night has always belonged to them, and the moon that shines upon them now gives its blessing night and day. But he can change that too. He just needs to find a way. But he won't think of that tonight, instead keeping his eyes fixed on the person that he loves most. He can't see the light that he radiates, but Hiyori does. Those times when he's cried, when he's smiled, when he's pouted and sulked and thrown a tantrum - he's been there for them all, shining upon him and wiping away every hurt and dark thought.

He has nightmares sometimes, and he wonders if they might not have been predictions for the future. They were warnings, precognitive dreams, yet each time those dark futures would be erased by his twin's light. ]

Yes... I understand. We have to return to being Sou and Nagito tomorrow, twins who were born together yet who must lead separate lives, but tonight... Please, let me have all of you.

ME thinkin bout them following the ff tradition of one dying young & one living traumatized

[killed]

[ It seems that his parents were an arranged marriage as well. They hadn't originally intended on it for him, but changed their mind upon realizing that he only took interest in those so far beneath him. He might elope with some servant if they weren't careful, or worse, remain alone for his entire life. He would ruin his future to satisfy his childish whims and selfish nature.

He'd asked his mother once if they love each other, and she smiled and patted his head and answered that they've grown fond of each other. They're the ideal couple in public, the ideal partners who share a mutual respect and intelligence that allows them to work toward any goal, and a husband and wife who stay in separate rooms at night. He wraps his arms around Komaeda, grabbing fistfuls of his shirt as he buries his face against him.

Everything is about appearances. He wonders how many times they've been with someone else behind closed doors where no other can see. ]

... It doesn't matter if we're family or not. I would find you in each and every life, and I'll never once love another. I won't be with anyone else. I will be a husband to no one else, so let us speak of it no more.

[ Those words leave no room for argument, and even if one were to come it would fall on deaf ears. But there's a truth to it. For all of his kindness, there's the same cruelty that all rulers are capable of hidden just beneath the skin. He would slit a person's throat open to avoid touching such filth, and nothing would stop him from cutting a woman open and rip her womb out to prevent a birth, because it would be a happier ending. But he doesn't need to worry about such things. His husband is here, his happiness and his life is in his arms now, stroking his hair and purifying his dark thoughts.

He draws in a breath, clinging for several seconds more before giving a little nod and relinquishing his grip. Their parents will be asleep by now, in separate beds in rooms spaced apart. ]

Yes, let's. It's a little chilly out tonight, so you should bring a jacket... Do you think that we'll see a shooting star? Maybe if we make the same wish, it'll come true.

I HATE I TTOO, KO MY SELF INSERT FR

[killed]

That's no good, Nacchan, you'll catch a cold...

[ He sighs and shakes his head, rubbing his arm to try and ease some of his anxiety. There's a note of apology to his look, aware that he'd said something thoughtless. He does move to go to the closet now, finding a spare blanket and a shawl. He sets one atop the other before he makes his way back. No one will notice. He's watched strictly during the day and evenings, but at night even Hiyori is given relative freedom to do as he pleases. As long as he remains perfect, there should be no problem - perfect grades, perfect behavior, perfect friends, perfect everything so that he'll be perfectly loved.

It was a mistake to act so strongly on his emotions. It's not something he can or will accept, but he needs to be more reasonable in his approach. It has to be as flawless as everything else about him, albeit even Hiyori himself can't say why it upset him so much. It's much like how he can't understand the sickening feeling that he gets watching others go about their day, nor the way his stomach churns as he watches them smile and laugh, talk and argue about things that don't matter.

It never occurs to him that they're happy, because he can't acknowledge that he's unhappy. No one would find the smile that he wears to be any less genuine or cordial. He's practiced for years, spending long hours in front of the mirror until he had mastered everything from mirthful to sheepish to sympathetic. But it seems different when others do it, the way that their moods fluctuate and they laugh even as they complain, how easily everything seems to come to them. The way that couples cling to each other and squeak and embarrass one another with stupid pick up lines and teasing.

It's because he's better than them, he thinks. The way that they act is embarrassing. It's vapid and worthless, and it's why they remain so far beneath him. It's because they all love him so despite not knowing him at all, and how foolish is that? He would never lead such an aimless life. Because he knows already - they can't make their dreams reality, but he can. He can do anything. He just has to work harder until he reaches his goals.

He has his twin, and he has everything he has and will build up, so he doesn't need anything else. He has the person he loves most, the one who colors his world and puts his heart at ease, and so if he had just one wish... ]

You have to keep what you wish for a secret too! It won't come true otherwise! But if by some chance we do... Yes, I'm certain that it'll come true! God will hear us and grant a miracle.

[ ... It would be to be happy with his twin like this always, in this life and in the next, for all eternity. But there's no reason to believe God exists, and happiness isn't something that one can simply wish for.

He has to work even harder so he can grasp the dreams and miracles of love. He has to be willing to do anything to preserve it, and he will, no matter what the cost might be. He steps out the window and into the courtyard, careful with the first couple steps. ]

OK THAT'S TRUE BUT I LOVE HIM FOR IT!!

[killed]

[ Hiyori slips the shawl into one hand and manages to balance the blanket on his shoulder, keeping it halfway in his elbow as he reaches under the sheet to slip the shawl around his twin's shoulders and loosely tying it in the front who'll stay in place. It's not a jacket, but it's thick and warm. It's one that he had pciked out specifically for him for times like this. He adjusts the blanket one more time, tucking it under one arm now, before he finally reaches to take Komaeda's hand. He interlaces their fingers, enjoying the sensation of their hands touching.

If he lays the blanket out for them to rest on, he can pull some over him. Between the two and Hiyori, he should be able to stay warm enough. These plans are normal for Hiyori, who's always been sick and frail. Yet, he can't see him as anything other than beautiful. He's never thought of him as odd or moody, and his mood swings are part of his personality. He's perfect, but were he any other way he would be just as wonderful and beloved. ]

You're right... You are Nagito Hiyori, my dearly beloved husband... You shine brighter than any star in the sky. I don't know what I'd do without your light to guide me.

[ Komaeda is a vibrant light that seems to erase everything else, so blinding that he can focus on nothing else. He seems to burn even brighter today, and there's only him, wearing a sheet as a veil, holding his hand, the person he would build a caste with if only he would live to see its walls put up. He's can try to forget his life as the heir of the Hiyori family when it's just the two of them. He doesn't resent his role, but he wishes to focus on his own wants, on who he is, and who he loves most. It's selfish, but he's already accepted that he's selfish.

It's a little cool out, but he feels so warm. It must be because his face is red as he sheds that identity and he thinks of what they could have - it hurts his heart to think of how short that time might be, but even then his heart thumps at the though of what they might do together. Maybe their parents can't know, but certainly there's one or two of their friends who could understand. ]

Maybe we can find one shaped like heart with an arrow through it.

[ One for lovers. ]